I just remembered that I might be getting a new-to-me countertop dishwasher this weekend and I got excited. Being a grown up is weird.

The significant boost in alertness and decrease in fatigue I get when I take a couple of sublingual B12 tabs makes me think I might be incredibly deficient. 😬

I sometimes forget that not everyone is fully obsessed w/the whole thing & get annoyed at the same reports of people "not sure" if that fucking ape *really* did anything wrong. But now that Sondland's testimony lines up with Taylor's, Democrats need to ride this fact until the wheels fall off:

wasn't dangling aid to get an actual "corruption" investigation, he was dangling aid to get a PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT of one, and to have Zelensky to mention Biden as a target.

The thing I want most this week is restful sleep. That doesn't seem like too much to ask, Universe?

I don't know how anyone manages to take time off... Taking a 4 day weekend basically requires me to work double time the week leading up to it.

Which is why I haven't taken proper holidays in over a year, and why I am incredibly burnt out. 😩

I've officially given up trying to explain to people that the reason they love DST is not that there is "more sun". You're getting up later to make the most of existing daylight - the planet hasn't shifted on its axis specifically to make your 5pm patio happy hour a bummer, you dumb shits.

Enjoying the endless stream of complaints on the about the new auto-refreshing timelines causing people to lose their place, almost as though the site is a complete garbage factory built to maximize impressions instead of facilitate conversation.

Is this the "fall back" weekend? Man, I could for sure use an extra hour, so... Good timing, universe?

Also, could you time-change-hating dipshits PLEASE get off your "DST all year" hobby horse? Humans literally need that sunlight in the morning. Like, it's great you've decided that significantly increasing the likelihood of SAD and sleep disorders in the local population is a good tradeoff for your slight preference for "hating to commute home in the dark", you complete morons.

That fucking photoshopped pic of the dog getting the medal was the last straw. It was like Chidi seeing the dot over the 'i' -- it broke me. I'm out. Done. The USA can honestly burn and i'll be there with a long stick for making s'mores. See you idiots in hell.

No one reads my shit anyhow so I'm just going to say it: does anyone else get, like, a big-time rapey vibe from Will Forte? Am I the only one who wouldn't let him within 6 feet of me? Just me? Damn, ok.... 😬

Remembered it was nearly Halloween so booted up City of Heroes last night for a little door-knocking fun, but I haven't played in like 6 weeks and there was some event running with flag points and there were zombies and I was like, "I am too old and too high to figure out what is happening here" so I played Portal 2 for the 100th time then went to sleep. 😴

As much as I love the option of getting a Beyond Meat burger when I have a fast food craving, I might have to go back to ordering chicken or whatever... I'm not sure my innards can take the strain! 😩💩

I was making fun of Mark Zuckerberg's terribad haircut before it was cool.

How tf did I manage to tweak my back *while sleeping*?? Goddamn it, I am officially An Old™. 😞

I mean, I suppose we can count Bernier losing his seat as a win.

Oh nothing, just creeping back to this platform after my long relapse. [*hangs head*]

If you're one of those people who gleefully fart out the lyrics to Jonathan Coultons "First of May" like clockwork every year, please know that stopped being amusing in 2005 and everybody's just too polite to let you stop making an asshole of yourself again.

Avuncular boosted

Having a "Bad Janet" kind of day so far. What's crackin', nut-butts?

'Tis the season to bust out the fucking SAD light. Jesus... 😴😴😴 [*snorts coffee grounds*]

Having a "Bad Janet" kind of day so far. What's crackin', nut-butts?

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