thot pilgrim @DayGloChainsaw@mastodon.social

8 hours ago: a new site? this layout is confusing. where is everyone? how does this work. whats an instance?

Now: *covered in torn rags and goat bood, hitting the ground with sticks, waving a human skull around* TRAIN FUCKERS TRAIN FUCKERS TRAIN FUCKERS

Most of it involved lying on the floor and screeching

I haven't been which is too bad because she's done a lot of really funny shit in the past several hours.

My sister is on her period and is periodically screaming "you BHITCH" at me because she thinks I'm tweeting about her

I have never managed to sustain a Snapchat streak over 10 days and I probably never will

I'm just saying that even though those statistics are technically correct, they are not the best thing to point to if you want to prove the economic power of leftist governments. Which the Soviet Union wasn't even anyway, it was a weird authoritarian bureaucratic mishmash.

Like, in places where it was measured by units produced, workers would make cars without any engines in them. In places where it was measured by sheer tonnage, workers would make ridiculously heavy chandeliers that would tear down ceilings.

I wish people would stop using Soviet production statistics as proof of why communism is economically foolproof, because to be honest a lot of the shit they made was very terrible and usually did not work.

Just called my dad mom which is better than calling a teacher mom but also somehow worse

Too Good For Human Eyes

Honestly I could watch this video on a loop until I die https://youtu.be/Xud0YWhQsXc

Can someone just put me in like, a big The Truman Show style enclosed area where I can just make mistakes until I eventually learn from them, but also I don't ruin my life or anyone else's as a result of it

I wish that people would stop telling me to do things that are actually good ideas because, get this, being told to do something makes me want to do it less. Anyway if there's a lesson here it's that I'm petty and really fucking stupid

I'm vaguely aware that what I'm doing right now is probably not the best but also I'm not going to stop

Anyway I'm sure that my dad is still wrong, in some way. I am full force channeling the undue confidence bestowed upon me as a white man that allows me to believe this.

You know that moment when you're having an argument with your family and you realize that they're actually sort of right and at that exact moment the hill you will die on manifests before your eyes

Does anyone like, know a guy who knows a guy who could get me a laptop that fell off the back of a truck for dirt fuckin cheap

And here's the blank

Welp here's me

I wish I fucking knew where it WAS

DAMN!!!!!!!!! I WISH I FUCKIN HAD MY LAPTOP ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!