Sicario is a movie about Mario getting the flu, [DNT].

⚠️ WARNING. This post has been marked Dissent Not Tolerated (DNT).

kicked out of Heaven, and then Hell, because I wouldn’t stop referring to the Dark Lord Satan, Prince of Lies, as “Juicy Luci”

I’m sorry sir we can’t do that.

No, we only carry leg and arm prostheses.


I’m sorry sir but even if we could “the genie mist from Aladdin” wouldn’t be covered by your insurance.

In the Giver there’s that one kid who gets to be wikipedia or whatever and we’re supposed to want that job? Fuck that does he even post?

The penny hoarder is my sworn posting enemy. I will battle them into the grave. What the FUCK is this.


Days left till Halloween: 11

Followers left to 666: 14


If I was president I’d cancel the Secretary of State (boring, already know them all anyways) and make a secretary of games.

energy drinks are just canned vat of acid the joker fell into. hence Gamers.

Sprinkling clout on my post with a salt shaker but it’s the wrong shaker and now the post is covered in cringe.

the Emmy for “Ensemble Cast Most Capable of Getting It” goes to doctor. says he's depressed. says life seems harsh and cruel. says he feels any pain in his pockets?

this is a listenmen stan account. I am holding laser and Matt to making the pod

@lizardmentsh I was always really impressed that he read the whole thing. Incredible focus.

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