I got two interviews lined up

Wish me luck cuz I desperately need a new job

I can never find it, but back during all those clown sightings there was an article where a sheriff was telling people not to worry because "he believed it wasn't real clowns, just people in clown outfits" and I think about that all the time

This issue of visibility and hyper visibility is creating violent dynamics interpersonally and it’s weakening our praxis regarding working towards liberation.

Internalized Colonialism is insidious

Not to mention the deep deep resentment my community had against the Black community bc of visibility in media. There were constant remarks showing this resentment: “well THEY are included in stats; THEIR communal members got all these RTs when OUR women didn’t” things like that. Fucking sad. The resentment is so misplaced.

And I know there is a deep desire for visibility bc of how ppl have treated my work and exploited me BC of the visibility I gained by laboring. On birbsite ppl were clearly hate following me waiting for me to fuck up in order to launch smear campaigns and then plagiarize my work so they could replace my platform with their own — but in the mean time would continually ask me and peers to labor FOR THEM.

Sure- these tactics are great forms of solidarity - but I would think we’d have learned by now that other forms of direct action are needed. We need disruption, not merchandise.

To be clear, I don’t feel that crowdsourcing each other in need or attempting to create our own spaces is necessarily apart of this complex, although it can be in instances.

Anyways there needs to be more convo around this, bc social justice work and theory is being weaponized against marginalized ppl more frequently. Photo ops and performative marches aren’t fucking liberation.

Speaking of the commodification of social justice work and theory — I saw someone on IG refer to it as the “woke industrial complex” and although I take issue with the term “woke” (since it was co opted from the Black community), there is some validity to the phenomena being an industrial complex, I think.

I suppose I simply cannot and will never be able to relate to this desire to become apart of the system. I’d rather continue to work towards dismantling it — but it’s obvious where people’s true intentions lie.

We are losing focus on what is most important. People are getting way too hung up on obtaining visibility instead of finding avenues to Indigenous resurgence, resistance and inclusion.

Also is nobody super uncomfortable with the upcoming indigenous people’s march? What’s up with this opportunism on the eagle/condor ? What’s with this outsourcing of speakers instead of centering DMV ntvs? What’s with this focus on merchandise and photo ops? Why is nobody questioning the implicit capitalism driving this march?

People have successfully commodified social justice work and theory — and refuse to unpack what accountability truly means, while simultaneously subscribing to neoliberal ideology instead of communally working towards liberation.

I’ve taken a break from my the major platforms several times but this time - I don’t think I’ll be returning to birbsite or Faceshit. The platforms feel gentrified - as my bestie put it- and witnessing these dynamics replicate violently towards those of us who’ve helped carve out spaces on them, is triggering tbh.

I’ve witnessed first and second hand accounts where this dynamic have way to violence - where “elders” or cultural gate keepers exploit womxn in particular with the promise of access and authenticity.

Or where certain informational sources weaponize their followers in order to launch smear campaigns against their enemies - esp when conglomerates are involved.

It’s a real problem ppl are unwilling to address.

I’ve been thinking and writing frequently lately about authenticity and approximation to gain authenticity and it’s role in toxic or abusive dynamics both on social media and offline.

Have you noticed that in our communities ppl will extend “authenticity” to individuals in close proximity to higher profile informational sources?


sorry, rambling; I had a few medication shifts and I'm adjusting still to them.

but there is a concept in Japanese that is meant to convey that someone is being falsely activist in order to garner positive reputation, I think? roughly. but I'm drawing a blank on the term itself. (and it's less an epithet in some ways than 'virtue signaling', IIRC, b/c it's seen as fairly commonplace in certain contexts, and the term is only applied to people who "go too far" with it? I think)

@sydneyfalk @Lilrednacho I usually call it "pseudo"+whatever the narcissist is trying to fake, e.g. pseudo-feminism, or pseudo-ally, or, if the specifics aren't too important, just plain narcissist/-ic/-ism ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

but yeah, we need more precise words like gaslighting!


there aren't really great terms for these things, IMO precisely because they're difficult topics for a lot of humanity in general; the lust for the slim chance of being seen as purely altruistic is what negates the exact altruism they want, unfortunately.

fear, greed (of money or of other resources in general), pride -- all things that drive a need to be seen as "doing good"

this is the kind of thing shitbags have labeled "virtue signaling", which struck me as flatly inane...

nuclear discourse 

nuclear discourse 

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