The sounds of doves crying is eerily similar to the Price Is Right losing horn.

Current mood. It’s not even a bad thing, just an everything

A Facebook tale in two pictures: some of my high school friends went on to become cops ... and freelance beer marketers.😂

If your roommate were a werewolf, would they use the toilet or would you be stuck taking them for walkies with little plastic bags?

I’m super psyched about the Hudson Valley Tattoo Convention coming up in 2 1/2 weeks and I’m seriously hoping this COVID-19 business doesn’t ruin it

I let my hair grow out. I feel like with this look I need to DJ the Twelve Days of New Wave Christmas or something

I spiked her water with a pinch of salt.
Her refusal makes a whisper of the electrolytes.
I’ll cash the hangover in the morning

T: “Why are we all drunk?”
Me: “I 👏 keep 👏 telling you.👏 I 👏 am 👏 a 👏 chief enabler.”
T: “I mean, I heard you at the time but I really appreciate that now

It’s a weird miracle when you’re fermenting something and the end product doesn’t suck.

Intense food interaction 

I fucking love paella

I do occasionally wonder if I’m cut out to be the next Dread Pirate Roberts

I meant to talk to my cousin about roasted squirrel recipes and instead discussed pineapple wine.

THIS HIGHLY RELATABLE CONTENT BROUGHT TO YOU BY DOLE

All those evenings watching Project Runway finally paid off in fashion appreciation.

Doña Fela museum in San Juan, Puerto Rico. Check out the detail on this grey dress. The red fans are _crushed glass_. How freaking insane is that?

Experimenting on my Celiac-suffering brother (with his full consent, of course).

This stuff is promising miracles, I’m cautiously optimistic.

Back tattoo progress. I’m trying so hard to not to think of him/her as “Puff the Magic Ginger”

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