Pinned toot
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If you're an artist migrating from Tumblr @ me and I'll give you a boost 👍

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The maiden looked at the dragon's hoard. "It is certainly... not what I expected."
"One of a kind," the dragon said, sitting proudly on the pile of papers.
"You should organise it."
"Oh, thanks!" The dragon wrote 'organise this" on a paper and added it to the pile of to-do lists.

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I used to say things like that, when I was alive: "the computer has died" or "the toaster has drawn its last breath".
I had no idea. I'm the only human ghost in the house, but that's okay. The ghost of the Roomba is keeping me company.
#

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"You know humans will only tolerate us if we follow their rules," the vampire leader said.
"But it's fun, and edu-"
"Read the box."
"Um. Lego."
"And?"
"4-99 years."
"You were made three hundred years ago. So stop it."
"This set only says 8+."
"Oh? That's fine."

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"I wonder," said the robot, "do you think I am human?"
"You feed me, and stroke me, and you are warm to sit on," said the cat.
"Does that make me human?"
"No. But tell me, do you enjoy my company?"
"I do," said the robot.
"That is all I ask of any human," said the cat.

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⚠ALERT: Your timeline has accumulated numerous transcription and probabilistic errors and may be down for maintenance at 3AM local time tomorrow. Service will likely be interrupted for an hour. You may experience repeated time, nonlinear causality, or computational glitches.⚠

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another unrealistic beauty standard set by hollywood....

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Fat shaming 

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