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to anyone spreading the rumor that i tie or untie my shoes every time i put them on or take them off: fuck off

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love to wear my beanie "dumbass style"

cant wait to see what 2018 has in store for me

in 2019 i will be flipping my she shed

kinda livin got me feeling like black don quixote

i love my wife so much i think i'll get another.

Alexa show me some tig ol bitties and a fat ass

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No I am not your "pimp" no I am not your "pimpette" you are employing swerf language and will be rightfully banned.

Aaahhh!! [in a really shitty accent] Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez [back to regular white guy voice] go to bed!! 🙈 its getting late for a senator! 😊

to all new members migrating from tumblr: cw stands for "child warning" and ec stands for "extra cheese" good luck out there

looking to get my turkey stuffed like the fat bottomed pilgrims of old

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