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RuminantShoppingCart @RuminantShoppingCart@mastodon.social

Pinned toot

I am SUPER excited to be working with @estebanm on a song for a collaborative recording project for @awhaleslantern !

awhaleslantern.bandcamp.com
( bringing independant musicians together to collaborate in random pairs)

@estebanm is currently deep in lair alchemating sick chord progressions...

(in the bathroom) what did i come in here for? oh right , a shit

alchemist: GOLD I GOT GOLD!

me, the figment of his amalgamation: no ya didnt

florist: all these lillies are actually edible!
me: REALLY? (i adjust my underwear, already filled with half eaten lilly bouquets)

When Scott Pruitt gets canned, I'll take those tactical pants.

sitars are indian instruments famous for the "sit on arse" position in which u play them

screaming 'SICK BEATS!' , pounding spiders on the kitchen counter with spoons

[at the store] i'll get some cherry coke zero

[2 hrs, 24 cans later] why am i peeing so much but i could get up and down all day its pretty fun whoo

the world: *collapses

me: *indoors eating pb

yeti: *outdoors smelling pb

kim jung un: *accepts donut

Escape from the planet of the apes, the tragic death scene

I am SUPER excited to be working with @estebanm on a song for a collaborative recording project for @awhaleslantern !

awhaleslantern.bandcamp.com
( bringing independant musicians together to collaborate in random pairs)

@estebanm is currently deep in lair alchemating sick chord progressions...

they call him marshmalleaux because all day long he smoke out on the bayou

Strap in, boys. Cuz where we're going, it's illegal to not wear seatbelts

Then she saw that Ouboros wasn't content with being the infinite circle of life. It, too, had tasted the apple and it was still feeding, devouring itself until it choked to death on what it had already eaten.

sayin hello to my jello an jello! to my jell-bro

The many armed weaver of tales sets down a fresh tray of vegan zucchini muffins that smell delectable. Other treats on the table include brownies & sandwiches - clearly labelled.

"Greetings, greetings, welcome! I hope your travels here have not been too strenuous. Please, make yourself comfortable - there's beverages in the fridge in the corner, and books in every other room - if you need help finding anything, I'll be happy to assist."

we need to dress the elephant in the room because that penis is distracting, gigantic, i have no words

I had been told I was wasting time and money on my 'crazy' theory.

BUT after years of research, surveillance and trap setting, I had finally done it.

And honestly I didn't even care about proving anyone wrong by presenting definitive proof of what I'd suspected for years.

This was my personal triumph.

Finally able to confront my almost decade long adversary, I asked, "Why MY socks?"

The dragon admitted, "I had to hoard SOMETHING."