The Ham Kleptomaniac @The_Ham_Kleptomaniac@mastodon.social
Where's Assbott
Joined Aug 2018
food
pretty sure this pico de gallo has gone bad but 2018 is all about making hazardous life choices
The Ham Kleptomaniac
boosted
which one of the tooter dads was responsible for this https://kotaku.com/dad-gets-toddler-to-climb-inside-game-machine-steal-ni-1829121501
this is a post only of interest to @luigithirty but the rays have three different top prospects name Lowe and it's fucking me up
you, an idiot: i smoke weed at 4:20 lol
me, the serene genius: i smoke at 6:90
Remember Benghazi acrostics? We should bring those back for 2019
Alright I give up I don’t know what you people think is is funny
The jerk store called, they said they’re running out of cum
The Ham Kleptomaniac
boosted
life hack: stumble ass backwards into a loving S.O. whose emotional support and general competence thoroughly enrich your life and fill you with joy all the time
The Ham Kleptomaniac
boosted
Dadposting meta, ptsd
Please content warn dadposting I'm working on my ptsd and don't need to be triggered at work or have flashbacks to csa lmao every time I talk or think about my dad I'm that judge Judy GIF of her tapping her watch like when will he fucking die. God I have really violent revenge fantasies about him that make me feel really conflicted. On the one hand they're comforting but on the other they're technically like morally wrong or something but they make me feel good
Ben Shapiro and Chapo facing each other in fortnite will achieve the singularity and cause our simulation to be blessedly shut down
Email is an absolute blight on the modern worker and I’m not sure I support any leftist platform that does include making it illegal
I’m not saying anprims are *right* I’m just saying I *get* it
*spends 16 hours a day in front of various electronic boxes that make my mental health worse* yeah anprims are morons why would anyone advocate for less technological creep in our lives
The Ham Kleptomaniac
boosted
forget yoshi - isabelle literally, canonically, commits tax fraud
police are actually facist, part whatever/infinity https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/sep/15/massachusetts-police-tweet-leftwing-surveillance-boston
now i really want an apple pie at 11:30 on a dang monday thanks @shepardstone
happy birthday and happy monday to @citrustwee@bofa.lol
Where's Assbott
Joined Aug 2018
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