AJ Vernon @aVernon@mastodon.social
1 existence/person/earth
workin' on this life
oh right this exists
haven't tooted since last may
tooting is still a bad term
it's a fart, people
maybe I'm onto something, using Mastodon as a microfiction presentation platform; 500 characters is an interesting limit for such a thing.
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This week on Bone Apple Teeth, Tara and I discover their perfect waifu and the sheer depths of depravity humanity can go. Surprisingly, the two aren't related.
This week, Anthony and Tara make some bands, and discover the depths of human ingenuity.
today I witnessed a woman holding her coffee ahead of her as if it were a light in the darkness guiding her forward, towards the back seat of the bus
@beej I have an important question for you.
If shitting outside is a man's romance, is pissing outside a man's one night stand?
Today, Tara and I learn that not everything is the sum of its parts, for better or for worse. https://youtu.be/7w0i_QPplSo
So I made a dumb thing with my friend. If you have a weak stomach, or dislike people swearing, you probably shouldn't watch this.
Peoples of the Federated Timeline, I am requesting that you send me images of terrible food items, disgusting meals, moronic "trendy" foods, etc. If you said "what the fuck" out load when you first saw it, it's perfect for my purposes!
Videos are also cool, but less so.
I need pictures, pictures of bad food
Wolverine but instead of claws it's smaller Wolverines that pop out that also have little Wolverines that pop out etc etc.
It's 4am and I've got LoadingReadyLIVE tomorrow. I am going to be exhausted.
So... tune in to http://twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun tomorrow at 17:30 PDT and watch me be exhausted and funny, I guess?
Huh. 300 characters left.
LoadingReadyLIVE is a live variety show created by LoadingReadyRun, one of the longest-lived internet sketch comedy troupes.
150 characters left. Forget it. I have to sleep.
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I very quickly would like to ask those of you out there who own a house to please, PLEASE put a doorbell or even a door knocker on the front door. Physically knocking on the door is rough on the knuckles for us canvassers, if we have to knock a hundred in a row.
I need pictures. Pictures of terrible food.
I was looking for a joke to make my girlfriend laugh
Couldn't think of a better joke than my life
I don't have a girlfiend
Grapplefans of Mastodon, what was your personal 5* match of Wrestlemania this year?
Is saying the word Twitter forbidden here?
