seeing ads for this "Google Places" or whatever all over the place and i'm just like, oh good, america's creepiest monopsony has found yet another way to exploit its ghoulish panopticonesque data hoard to run a protection racket

my favorite Google Places ad is in the West 4th St station here in NYC, a big poster that reads "You don't know {West Village} yet" where "West Village" is in a different color from the rest of the text. no one would actually say this (you'd always say "_the_ West Village"). you can almost hear the computer-voice template replacement in your head.

You don't know
WEST.
VILLAGE.
yet.

weird and perfect reality of google trying to overwrite the territory with its map

whoops I meant to say "weird and perfect example" though I guess it is also our weird and perfect reality. (taking "perfect" in not in its meaning of "nice" but in its more sinister meaning of "somehow considered to be complete even though nothing can ever truly be complete")

@aparrish The computer voice should have a Slavic accent to emphasize the speaker's trouble with an English definite article.

@wrenpile probably easier for google to simply change its search algorithm to bury any mention of the definite article and its uses in english.

—shouldn't there be a 'the' there?
—nah I just googled it and google says no
—you're right. when you think about it, none of us need 'the'. let's simply never systematically indicate via lexical and syntactic means which things have been previously mentioned or are otherwise salient
—agreed. let's celebrate this at my favorite bar in lower east side

@aparrish Right, that's the one that serves ghoti and chips, right?

@natecull @dredmorbius @wrenpile @aparrish

and none of them are the same as Vest Willage, which is how much Will boost you get for a given vest

@aparrish Such a tell. Like ads for San Franciscans talking about "the 101" [freeway].

Uh huh, oh you're soooo local. *eyeroll*

@aparrish that’s the Greenwich village station isn’t it?

@aparrish
now that's a mouthful!
(but unfortunately all too true)

🤖 ⛓️

@aparrish I love the framing of this as a protection racket. Makes perfect sense.

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