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Allison Parrish @aparrish

I'm getting to the point in my career where I know enough about what interests me and what I want to do that I get frustrated in retrospect by the perception of wasted time on the path I've taken to get where I am (professionally and creatively). it's really hard to place value all of my experiences—especially experiences that feel like false starts or dead ends after the fact— even though I know that I wouldn't be the same person without them.

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tl;dr, I am old and bitter and the ability to make decisions about your life is wasted on the young

@aparrish i think maybe the young, acting in the absence of perspective on most decisions, don't actually have as much of that ability as we attribute to our past selves in retrospect?

@aparrish Yes, just a wee bit of mentoring saves people from years of going in the wrong direction. :/

@aparrish Oh I can sympathize. But it may be helpful (or possibly more frustrating) to consider that our situations are overwhelmingly the product of "accidental" factors. Western philosophy (especially (protestant) capitalism) overemphasize the role of individual decisions.

@aparrish I appreciated finding this.

I've come to feel that in most experiences even those that felt frustrating or failed as they were unfolding, there is the seed of a thing that later became, you know, The Thing.

Looking back I see myself, somewhat coherently, making a path of stepping stones. But at the time, it was just one jump, one jump, one jump, and the river was daunting.

@aparrish I found this through @katebowles (thanks Kate) I sympathise, and the thing that gives me hope and a bit of comfort is that word *perception* - it's not really wasted time. Others/society might imply otherwise, but could you have taken it away and still be who/where you are? I couldn't for me. For some of it, I don't value all experiences in terms of savouring something (or even at all)- but I'll work to let the perception of value be mine and not someone else's- they didn't live it :)