Apparently there was a transformer meltdown in New York last night. The whole sky lit up bright blue and social media went straight to aliens - when my wife showed me the video I started gibbering "Ooh, big fault! Arcing! BIG FAULT!"

So to understand this news, and to understand why this is so rare, and to understand the post-19th Century world in general, how DOES a transformer work, anyway? Well...

@ifixcoinops

> to understand this news, and to understand why this is so rare, and to understand the post-19th Century world in general

TOO MUCH

CAN I PLEASE UNDERSTAND MY BREAKFAST CEREAL FIRST

(<3 jk)

@sydneyfalk reciprocal <3 but also on the subject of breakfast cereals OMG WHY ARE AMERICAN CORNFLAKES SO BAD. The Kellogg's in the UK is fine and I assumed the same brand would be good in the US too, but they're DREADFUL! They're tasteless and gritty like the nastiest 30p-a-box supermarket own brand crap. I have to buy the expensive organic cornflakes from Trader Joe's to get what I'd consider bog-standard Kellogg's quality. HOW IS THIS HARD I THOUGHT CORN WAS AMERICAN

@ifixcoinops

because this is the United States, we have a film to explain

you see, Road To Wellness was a historical documentary, and John Cusack invented corn flakes by accident purely to make money after vilifying masturbation, and

...

okay, so the important part is that you have to remember the United States is basically shite start to finish, and if our elected representatives can get extra money for letting corn flakes have lead or asbestos in them they will, because

money money money

@ifixcoinops

also corn isn't even natural, IIRC humans selectively mutated some wheat or shit to make this absurd joke of a plant that is admittedly pretty tasty on the cob with butter and salt but happens to be an abomination of nature

like humans

see how all the pieces fit together? is the puzzle clearer yet?

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