Christine Love @christinelove@mastodon.social

Honestly given the size of the crowds milling about drinking yesterday I’m frankly surprised there isn’t MORE broken glass strewn across the streets. I mean. There’s a lot. Just not as much as you’d think

OKAY. EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE FINE. WHAT ELSE YOU GOT, GERMANY. BETTER HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT

Wait I just realized it’s nearly 4AM back in North America so if you’re seeing this I guess not

WOW ANYONE EVER HEAR ABOUT THIS “GETTING A FULL NIGHT’S SLEEP” SHIT? SEEMS WILD AND OP

What I’m trying to say is, it’s been a VERY long day.

HAD EXACTLY TWO AND A HALF HOURS OF SLEEP IN THE PAST 24 HOURS

CAUGHT SOMEONE IN THE ACT OF SUCCESSFULLY PICKPOCKETING MY PHONE FROM MY PURSE AND HAD IT THROWN BACK AT ME WHEN HE REALIZED I SAW HIM DO IT

REALIZE ONLY WELL AFTER I ARRIVE AT THE HOTEL, WITH EVERY NEARBY ELECTRONICS STORE CLOSED EARLY ON SUNDAY, THE ONE THING I FORGOT TO BRING: A POWER CONVERTER FOR MY COMPUTER

SOMEHOW ARRIVED IN COLOGNE ANYWAY, TWO HOURS LATER THAN EXPECTED, ON THE WRONG TRAIN, THAT I TECHNICALLY KIND OF DID NOT HAVE A TICKET FOR BUT THANKFULLY NOBODY ASKED

SORRY HANG ON LET’S BACK UP A LITTLE

SLOWLY COME TO UNDERSTAND WITH INCREASING HORROR THE ONLY POSSIBLE CONCLUSION GIVEN THE TWO PREMISES “CAUGHT MY NONSTOP TRAIN WITH TEN MINUTES TO SPARE” AND “HAS BEEN MAKING SEVERAL STOPS”

DID I MENTION THAT THIS IS AT 9AM LOCAL TIME AND MY BRAIN STILL THINKS IT’S 3AM

WATCHED AS THE TRAIN CAR FILLED UP AT EACH STOP WITH AN INCREASINGLY LOUDER THRONG OF COSTUMED CARNIVAL PARTIERS WITH A SEEMINGLY ENDLESS SUPPLY OF ALCOHOL WHILE BLASTING MUSIC LIKE RICK ASTLEY’S “NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP” AND A DANCE REMIX OF “SWEET CAROLINE”

NEARLY MISSED MY DIRECT TRAIN TO COLOGNE BECAUSE I COULDN’T FIGURE OUT WHERE MY LUGGAGE HAD BEEN DELIVERED, AND SOMEHOW MADE IT WITH ONLY TEN MINUTES TO SPARE

I HAVE BEEN IN EUROPE, FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME, FOR LESS THAN A DAY AND SO FAR I HAVE:

Guten Morgen 😴🔫

Just kidding, please look forward to me having no energy to process anything because I’ll be arriving at a miserable hour in ANY time zone. Pray for me

Well, seeya in… I guess ten hours? Please look forward to me being extremely weird about being in Europe for the first time!!

airport selfie