i mention that i'm a mastodon influencer and the arbys cashier calls the police

whenever i drive by an arbys they have to lash me to the mast like odysseus

if you don't use a content warning when asked the kids from cyberchase come out of your monitor and kick you in the taint

cracker barrel is where you go when you get banned from chili's for saying the n-word

@cjwyoming Kicked this dingus out of my bar once for being obnoxious and trying to bring in some kids with fake IDs.

jon tron had his neck removed to make room for more racism

was just reminded of the time i went to go visit my very mormon grandparents in salt lake and they were all like "a new italian place just opened lets go try it out" and we went and it was olive garden

when you get 500 followers on here the mastodon himself shows up to your house and sucks you off

just poppin in here so that i can stay on the explore list

cool that al gore invented the internet but kinda sucks that he invented climate change 😩

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