Pinned toot

just a #introduction for those interested Show more

still tossing up whether to migrate to the bofa account but i do have one there, if you're interested. it's @cybercriminal@bofa.lol. and if you're interested in my personal acc, it's @ryan. thanks

ok so i get the dualism of sincerity and irony but you're all missing out on a very special third category: apathy

the obvious solution to the fermi paradox is that all sufficiently advanced life ends up being too online to bother trying to find other alien worlds

having a podcast as a sort of fashion accessory

happypost Show more

how fucking good are tater tots just sayin

sex tip Show more

i made a personal acc for me to post things that don't have a general vibe of horny and online at @ryan

Skeletons are funny because they're meant to be a morbid memento mori but when you see them depicted walkin round and doing normal stuff they look hilarious and goofy

ryan boosted

when i see someone talkin shit about david lynch on the tl

just accidentslly blasted sound out of my phone during class. never trust your phone. it is a small metal tablet of misery

the people who cw like "yeah literally 100% my hog, this is not a joke" and post a picture of swine cannot be trusted. exercise extreme caution

cowards, fool's: make a mistake on their toot and delete it, filled with shame and regret
legends: post the erred toot. let the world see. they shall care not of this petty blunder

shout out to the straight therapist who was flustered at my predicament of being single and literally suggested to me that should i find a boyfriend by cruising for one at the gym

(foucault voice) horny...it is a prison, except one made not of bars of iron, but dm's, and nudes,

sadposting Show more

men aren't real. they're just a spook story parents tell their kids about

@chest_bot open my cold, dead, heart and let me feel something real again

the fantasy of going back in time to kill someone is appealing because it subverts the overwhelming feeling that no individual has agency over history and we are all collectively slaves to the arc of social and political change

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