Halsted M. Bernard @cygnoir@mastodon.social

Whoops, I never did a proper #introduction!

I often describe myself as a:
* #writer of fiction … I write and perform stories
* chronicler of foibles … I am an online #diarist
* wrangler of chaos … I am a #librarian and database designer

My about page has more:
https://cygnoir.net/about/

What I'm up to now:
https://cygnoir.net/now/

📚 Read: The Little Stranger by Sarah Waters ⭐️⭐️ The setting is well-researched and well-written, especially the fate of grand estates in post-war Britain, but I wasn’t much interested in the plot or characters.

Don't go anywhere and don't click on anything: https://www.cygnoir.net/2020/11/22/dont-go-anywhere.html

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about that Maya Angelou quote, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” I need to learn how to do this before it happens again. My heart is so sore.

For me, it’s not elation, but relief. Not pride in voting, but gratitude for the grassroots activists who fought so others could vote. Not rest, but resolve for harder work until “for liberty and justice for all” is real.

When I’m feeling overworked, anxious about the upcoming election, and enraged about the lack of federal leadership during a pandemic, I like to start a 50,000-word writing project. 😱 #NaNoWriMo

Earlier today I talked myself out of buying a Hobonichi Weeks planner with a cover from Shaun Tan’s “The Arrival”. It was a close call; I love the graphic novel so much. https://www.oblationpapers.com/shaun-tan-arrival-weeks.html

Yesterday my aunt died of COVID-19. I’m not sharing this for sympathy; I’m sharing this because people are still prioritizing their convenience and comfort over others’ lives. I am begging you to take this seriously. #WearAMask

Criminy hopes you are finding a bit of calm today.

I don’t know how I feel about algorithm-powered soundscape app Endel. 🎧 Listening to its “Relax” mode helped me breathe through a panic attack earlier this week. But the “Focus” mode makes my brain itchy. http://endel.io/

Micro.blog #ADayInTheLife photo challenge! I enjoy Micro.blog because without the use of “likes” I push myself to interact more.

📷 my analog workspace
📍 Portland, OR, USA
🕚 19:20 PDT

Had a dream last night that I was sorting through a giant box of adapters, looking for just the right one that would allow me to continue working. 🙄 Why is my subconscious such a hack?

One year ago today. 💔 I still miss you so much, Zenny.

Currently reading: Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman 📚 https://micro.blog/books/9781982111908

Your ‘Surge Capacity’ Is Depleted — It’s Why You Feel Awful – Tara Haelle

How do you adjust to an ever-changing situation where the ‘new normal’ is indefinite uncertainty? https://elemental.medium.com/your-surge-capacity-is-depleted-it-s-why-you-feel-awful-de285d542f4c

“In periods of recovery or extreme vulnerability, one may temporarily disappear as a means of self-protection.” Amethyst from I forget where. The skies clearing, then we hear news of RBG.

Update from Portland: AQI still at Hazardous level. Haven’t been outside in a week. About to start another remote workday. Hoping for better air soon.

House smells like a campfire. (But no one made us s’mores; I checked.) Throats are scratchy. Kittens are unbothered.

Failed to focus. S’okay; blurry is how I feel today.

After mere moments outside trying to capture the wildfire skies I was left with a feeling that has not subsided. Not really emotions, more a state of the body: ready for flight while shocked into stasis.

“This is not a dream, but you still need to wake up.” Labradorite heart from The Raven’s Wing Magical Co. Portland.