Pinned toot

My :

Interactive creative and community builder in screen content industry (, , , ) and freelance writer on and

Written for (reprinted by )

Co-founder of the Independent Web Series Creators of Canada

Also , with

Just checking in on Mastodon.Social after several months hiatus to see how the genpop has grown, or is it still mostly cryptocurrency bros

(nothing against them... its just NOT my interest)

Got a spam email from

ANONYMOUS HACKER

Subject line: "Important! You have been recorded masturbating! I have Carrie.mp4!"

I'm resisting replying:

Hawt. Being hacked and blackmailed by an anonymous hacker recording me masturbating IS MY KINK

Sometimes I wish xojane still existed so I could finally get around to writing: IT HAPPENED TO ME: I'm a social justice warrior who accidentally raised a libertarian :(

My life is basically now watching porn in between opening social media and going ballistic in terms of WHATEVER IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING

This is a subtoot, because I can’t reply to the original toot without getting a headache, but it also works as a PSA:

Do not post blinking gifs without marking them as sensitive media and hiding them behind a suitable CW (e.g. “stroboscopic”, “blinking lights” or “seizure warning”).

I was listening to a Best of 2018 songs playlist on Youtube and I was like why are the songs so fucking fast -- what is wrong with the KIDS THESE DAYS!!???

Somehow I had accidentally put the play speed at 2x

So where are all you people now that the is under attack in America?

Note left for me overnight by my 16 year old son, found on my keyboard this morning:

//Don't know where it is now, but there's a large bug in the house, possibly a bumble bee last seen stuck on the blinds near the couch middle window. Please deal with it.

Thanks in advance//

THANKS.

IN.

ADVANCE.

I’m thinking of adding an emotional labour section to my CV

The other night my BOYF was sleepy so I said IM GOING DANCING

resident douche kept asking about my panties

So I sexily hitched my skirt up

Reached down between my legs...

And with a flick of the wrist I showed him my secret garden

A period pad full of blood

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...and blew one of the flypaper's under my arm, GETTING IT STUCK to my armpit hair

so after screaming from OMG!! OMG!! OMG!! i then was scream/crying trying to pull the paper out of my armpit without ripping the hair out

I THEN HAD TO COMB THROUGH MY PIT TO DIG OUT ALL THE DEAD FLIES

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*i just remembered this story last night and thought i would share (2/2)

Show thread

CW: HILARIOUS GROSS STORY ON WHY I NOW SHAVE MY ARMPITS AFTER YEARS OF NOT SHAVING THEM

So i didn't shave for yeaaaaaaaaaaarrrsss and sported the full hairy armpit thing when it was NOT in style

then one year we stayed in my ex-husband's trailer outside of their farm

they had set up all these fly traps -- you know the long sticky strips of flypaper, all over the camper as...FARM COUNTRY

i was in the middle of doing dishes when a BREEZE came in ... (1/2)

I recently had to explain to a lesbian friend the expression "why men" because she had no frame of reference...

...and i was like...you know...when they are all acting like...men things do

...and she was all: lol (silly bisexuals/heterosexuals)

the other night as i was falling asleep i had a GENIUS IDEA

Me to me: what someone needs to invent is a device like a hair dryer only for your body and it blows cool air instead of hot

me to me: YOU JUST INVENTED THE FAN, NIMROD

I dreamt last night I was hired as the Digital Marketing Director of the Association of Vaping Companies tasked with making VAPING look cool

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