School has been out for the summer for just a few hours and I’m already ready to pass the kids along to the first bidder.

Came home from work/picking up kids, intending to nap.

Almost asleep… neighbor kid bangs on door needing a bandaid (he was playing with my kid).

Almost asleep again… neighbor kid’s dad texts to tell me to send his kid home.

Almost asleep AGAIN… kid’s teacher calls to tell me she dropped off his yearbook. At the same time, husband texts to tell me about the “mysterious envelope of unknown origin” on doorstep. Which was said yearbook.

So. Tired.

Earlier today my phone tried to autocorrect the word yikes to “tireless.”

Phone has officially given up. It already refuses to learn that I never actually mean “snd” despite adding it as a shortcut for “and.”

Meanwhile, earlier today I stopped to get lunch at the mall, because Café Rio. When I was returning to my car, I saw a single dreadlock resting in a puddle. I have so many questions. Did it come out of its own accord? Was there a fight? Was there an interesting story? Milli Vanilli had a story about when one of the guys’ braids fell out on stage.

I don’t know why, but I think about that a lot. Perhaps that’s why I was so fascinated by the dreadlock I saw today.

I was talking to my husband about a thing he showed me from the birdsite that made me laugh (pic) and I referred to it as a toot. Officially over it.

It’s been a bit. Insomnia has been lighter so my social media time has been limited.

I got a 24h faceban for saying gas hoarders deserve to die in a fire. 🙄

Someone I know got matching tattoos with their daughters.

The tattoos are *REALLY* bad. Better than prison tattoo, not at all worth having paid any money for. That bad.

Yet... that’s the sort of thing you don’t just tell someone, you know?

Me: I need to buy better shoes for work*
The mall: The fuck you will!

Mall apparently doesn’t open until noon on Sundays anymore, and the stores that ARE open only have the cheapest possible options for shoes that my old lady feet won’t find acceptable.

* I am a baker in a bakery now!

My Gmail finally shit itself today, in epic fashion. It booted me out of my session. Entered password. It said password was wrong. They texted a code to my phone. I entered it. They then asked me to enter a different email to prove it’s me (WTF? I didn’t have another so I entered R’s) and entered THAT code they sent and they said it’d take 48h to even send me a reset link. So no thanks.

Re: yesterday’s worries. Dropoff was a shitshow because of course it was. Acquired coffee, did a certain errand, wandered the Fred Meyer, went to Ulta to buy some reportedly magic face cream (the jury is out on that, I’ll try it later), then home for naps. Bread in the bread maker, leaving for pickup in T minus ten minutes. We’re gonna go through Dairy Queen because first day of in person school requires a treat, right?

Last summer, I’d pack the kids up when the cleaners moved downstairs (they start on the top floor & work down), we’d drive to Sonic (25 minute drive to either one), have lunch and then meander back home, have recess with the neighbors, and the cleaners would be done/gone by the time we got home. I cannot justify taking mySELF for a 25 minute solo drive for fast food. 3/3

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No, seriously. I’ve already done my Target trip for the week. We are stocked up on groceries and Costco. Don’t need anything. Wouldn’t mind getting my toes done but I’m still a little weird about going to those places while we’re still not all vaccinated. Literally the only thing I need to do is buy a set of cheap watercolors to replace the ones the 7yo lost. That’s not gonna get me out long enough to be out of the way of our cleaning service. 2/

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Me, every day over the last 13 months: I need a break from my kids. They need a break from each other. When will this end?

Me, today (and probably tomorrow and Tuesday): The kids go back to school every Monday and Tuesday now. I’m getting a break. The cleaners are coming tomorrow. I should get out of their way but THERE’S NOWHERE TO GO. What do I do with myself? 1/

Insomnia Theatre...

Me: I’m tired. I need to go to sleep now.
My brain: Y’know what?
Me: NO
Brain: Your parents had an awful lot of ace bandages in the house when you were growing up.
Me: Yeah, so? I ended up with most of them somehow.
Brain: And it was A LOT, right?
Me: I mean, yeah? More than five, anyway. Closer to ten. Threw ‘em out.
Brain: I think a normal person would have zero to two.
Me: Hmm. What IS a normal amount of ace bandages to own?
Brain: HAHAHAH EXACTLY.

Honestly, I’m just bored and unfulfilled. Struggling with the meaning and purpose thing. I took a lot of naps last week because I felt *exhausted* - way more so than usual - the entire time. I feel destructively bored and it’s taking a toll on, well, everything. 2/2

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Still not a fan of Sundays. Just looked up and saw how late it is. I have completed precisely fuck all today other than going to Starbucks with the 7yo (drive-thru) & going on campus so he could see where his classroom is.

Saw a job posting that would be pretty amazing (stuff I can do pretty much in my sleep working for a company I quite like, said company has some perks that are relevant to my interests) but can’t even apply due to the childcare/pickup situation. 1/

The 7yo has reacted badly to every! single! thing! today!

I also got almost no sleep last night due to the husband’s insulin pump beeping until 1:30am (I had been shoving him every 5-15 minutes to do something about it, and he didn’t until I finally said, IT’S 1:30 AND I HAVEN’T SLEPT YET BECAUSE YOU WON’T STOP BEEPING) combined with hot flashes, because apparently my meds aren’t working as well as they are supposed to anymore? Yay.

Current job availability for Sundays only:
* things that require certifications/licenses I don’t have (bartender, phlebotomist, CDL driver, various certified nursing things)
* things that have a 40 minute commute (see previous toots, my car has 110k miles on it and I’m not super willing to consume more than a gallon of gas for a low wage, 1 day per week job)
* jobs in Canada, while my passport needs renewed and they’re not letting Americans in anyway (for good reason)

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