Health 

Returned to being unmedicated as of the start of July. To be honest, it's been a marked improvement over how I felt the past while. I still feel like I've "lost" a bit of myself compared to who I felt like 3-4 months ago, but it's a start. I'm beginning to be able to think on my own feet again. The psychiatrist was supportive of my choice but warned that I could relapse again in the next 1-5 years, so I may eventually need to return to other medication. But for now, I feel on a better path

Show thread

Health 

The chills, headaches, anhedonic dizzy brainfog continues. Generally feeling like some of the things I rely on could collapse at any moment if I don't move to change soon. I don't know that I can wait till my next appointment to discuss discontinuing meds. It's still a ways off and every day I subject myself to these symptoms is another day that could endanger me... Still weighing my options and trying to get friends to check if my reasoning makes sense.

Show thread

Health 

The story isn't over it seems. The cognitive impairment and brainfog is still going on. Still getting random cold chills, motion sickness, headaches. When it seemed good, I was ok with it, but the adverse effects when they reappear are very bad. Probably going to request to go back to being unmedicated. Even though I know this is a lifelong condition, lithium is affecting my mental capacity and creative output. I'm not ready to throw myself at another mood stabilizer at the moment.

Show thread

Health 

Two days into med reduction, and starting to feel a small difference. First day in recent memory without a headache, brain feels less foggy, more emotional range, less cognitively slowed, don't feel as frozen mentally when I try to explore creative thoughts. Still probably too early to say for sure, they say it should take about 5 days. I'm probably not finished there, either way. Trying to navigate your brain being slowed to molasses while in it sure is something.

Show thread

Health 

minor success: I feel I had to fight for it, but I was able to convince the psychiatrist to reduce my lithium medication, for starters. I should the effects of that in the next few days. Doing a blood test after that adjustment. Also potentially on track to switch to a different medication in the long-term. Still, need to survive and function until then, while being cognitively slowed and dealing with brain fog.

Show thread

Health 

About a month later and the effects of the medication seem to be worse. Loss of focus and ability to think sharply. Bored by most things. Games aren't fun. Lack of intrinsic motivation to do things. Quality of work feels negatively affected. Creative sideprojects entirely stalled. Not depressed, more like dulled out by mood stabilizers. I really hope I can convey the gravity of this to my psychiatrist before things decline further, it's really not sustainable to remain like this.

Show thread

It would be neat to have a blog or video series or something that dissects level layouts and enemy formation of a few shmups. You could even timestamp it, for games where there's no dynamic difficulty or waves that block until clear.

Feel like I've hit a significant blocker on pretty much every project idea I've tried lately. Some are still slowly pushing ahead despite obstacles, but a fair amount of time is spent on just seeing if it's worth it to salvage things / what to do about it.

The big thing I'd like to implement is architecture definitions in-source. Internally, codegen already is a pattern substitution that transforms a set of captures into an encoded sequence of bytes, but these are hardcoded in the compiler. If there were language constructs to define this, then it would be possible to add platform definitions, without shoving a bunch of manual C++ code into the compiler.

Show thread

After looking at this again, I realize my way of doing the AST might not be thattttt bad, and for what it's worth, rustc uses a very similar representation for its nodes, with P<T>, an alias for Box<T>: github.com/rust-lang/rust/blob

Mine uses FwdUniquePtr<T> (a unique pointer to a forward-declared type, deleter defined in a separate translation unit)
github.com/wiz-lang/wiz/blob/m

It does mean cache misses compared to arena allocation, but it does allow a mostly immutable tree and enforces move-or-clone.

Show thread

Oh... apparently my save wasn't backed up to the Mega Everdrive X7, so when I powered on it was gone. Guess I gotta start over another time, and figure out how to persist saves. Other Everdrives would keep the save backed up at power off, and save to SD when reflashing, but not this one apparently! Guess I'll play something else for now.

Show thread

For the sake of it wrote down every syntactic node in the language. Looking at it this way, it seems way less daunting than the amount of boilerplate required to represent them in C++. Maybe a rewrite could use such a guide as a checklist, and go through it iteratively from parsing to semantic analysis.

Show thread

I think to have some success with that, I would need to first write a standalone arena allocator. Then delete all code past initial parsing, and gradually convert the code to use raw pointers returned from the arena allocator instead of "make unique" + moving a bunch of stuff. Once that works, gradually reintroduce upper layers. Pretty huge undertaking to get it right. Maybe one day I'll feel motivated to make the jump. Or I should just resign to maintaining the existing legacy code.

Show thread

It really stinks that changing the memory ownership for the AST has a ripple effect on the entire existing codebase in Wiz. I can't make changes without essentially starting over from a blank slate, because too many systems are built around unique pointers to nodes embedded directly in the syntax tree, so I need to rework how nodes are created at every level of the program.

Show thread

Decided to try out Langrisser 2. Pretty fun so far, and the soundtrack is excellent. You have a certain number of commanders and you use points to allocate units to them before battle. Keeping your units near the leader heals them each round, they have 10 points of HP and different attack/defense modifiers similar to Advance Wars.

Played a bit of Grapple Dog (the first few levels). Pretty fun platforming and collectathon elements. Although the grapple targetting is a bit finicky and seems to ignore targets if you're standing too close. Also, they have one-way paths that require restarting the level if you want to backtrack, and maybe too many collectable things per level (even on the first level), which kind of discourages me from wanting to 100% levels.

The post list view still needs pagination, and the stylesheet is pretty placeholder, but it's almost to the point I could start using this for writing posts and listing personal projects.

Show thread

Made progress on the static site builder. Now it can generate singular pages from a markdown page with some metadata, as well list views that are grouped together by content type and ordered by descending date.

It keeps a sqlite database of pages. That currently that doesn't confer much benefit over just an in-memory list, but eventually it cculd do partial rebuild based on what actually changed.

Tossing together a plan for building a static site. If I can toss together or find something that supports this, then I think things will be on a good path:

Show older
Mastodon

The original server operated by the Mastodon gGmbH non-profit