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I misread the subject of today's Offscreen as 'Saying no to bad memory' and I felt very seen and now I am doing web searches for this thing.

What was keeping you up last night, asks D?

Who knows. I think I was dreaming of a school reunion, and then when I woke up I was thinking about how to destroy capitalism, how to overthrow Trump, how to make ice cream.

I looking for the expiry date on some beef noodles when I realised, this shit will outlive humanity. Migon Fungal archeologists will unearth it and be able to feed their slaves on it when they travel back in time.

The first time I ever drank a latte was at the Brother’s Club in Bundaberg in the mid-90s. I struggle to imagine a less inner-city elitist establishment

I mean, I’m not sure _I_ would take advice, culinary or otherwise, from a meth manufacturer, no matter how mischievously charming.

Plemmons and Paul ran with that script like a 70s muscle car through a chain link fence. Just blew the gates off and burned up the road.

Considering changing my bio/sig “I, in my great and unmatched wisdom”

“I have to go into Skull Cavern to get radium ore to upgrade my tools and they keep stealing my sword,” is what I said to my employers on Friday but they didn’t have budget to buy me a new one.

A good reason to dislike rugby league is what it brings out in me, a desire to see someone hit as hard as possible. I mean....gross.

Only watched until half time. Now waiting for Ad Astra to start.

If you had 'The Catholic and Anglican churches will lead the way to establish a distinct sharia law for every cult that can convince a court they are real' in the 2019 sweeps, congratulations

I always feel I haven’t made a job my own until I’ve accidentally cc a client while making a dumb joke to the rest of the team.

Today, after four months, I finally secured this position.

Two decades ago before it was possible to detect asteroids zipping by I would have been stressed out at the idea of so many so often.

Today I rue so many missed opportunities.

In particular this comment: “Also you can beer batter and deep fry a whole, cooked cheeseburger (bun and all)”

Going to create forum software for white men who make things. Instead of a reply button it has an Ian Malcolm button to do The Thing.
The beauty of this idea is it is autological.

(Inspired by

I don’t see too many episodes of Glass Blowers Crying screening here.

Wherever the hell this has been for the last month, it’s very welcome back.

Talk to your peers. Sometimes it turns out that feeling of being dumb because you can’t understand something after a week is because it’s hugely complicated and often has people specialise in it.

I’m pretty late to the Be The Serpent podcast, but I also unreservedly recommend the poetry in astolat’s Victory Conditions.

My favourite variety of documentation is where the advice to go fuck myself is implied.

Sometimes I like to imagine my various slack correspondents reading my latest flippancy and being all

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