just remembered the best wedding thank you card ive ever received

@healyn You play Poison, you expect a full-throated singalong. Them’s the rules.

@remulacfrommars right? what are you gonna do, not sing it? fuck that

@healyn this is a perfect note, everything about it is flawless

@Tasnyx i think my favorite part is the "Love" at the end

@healyn this note has strong italian energy especially the "big whoop!!"

@healyn disrupting an italian wedding is more direct action than i think any of us will ever experience in our lives

@pig yea, i felt like i was doing it the right way

@healyn I don't think I could do a dance that isn't "erratic, unconventional, and non-Christian"

@healyn lmfao fuck those people weddings are for going hard

@kew i shouldve mentioned in my post that the groom is one of my best friends and he was just fucking around

@healyn lmfao i hope you asked if you could get the gift back

@healyn also....... *is* there such a thing as a classy dj????

@pbandkate oh boy, i really shouldve mentioned that the groom is one of my best friends and he was just fucking around (but no, there's no such thing as a classy DJ)

@healyn aaaaaahahahahaha i was fully reading this as an earnest angry note im glad that it was not but holy shit that would have been good

@pbandkate it would be waaaayyy funnier if it were serious

@Excuse_haver @pbandkate we just call him Joe (im not gonna give him the satisfaction of recognizing his fancy name)

@healyn I never would have imagined anyone named Giuseppe being that uptight

I've always said, the easier your wedding is to ruin, the less fun it will probably be

@healyn i want this whole note written out in live laugh love style calligraphy

also i always forget you have any name other than healyn lmao

@bryn if i had it my way my name would just be healyn

@healyn @bryn if you changed your name and got a promoter they would be...

A healyn agent

@healyn “no gift can erase the heartache you’ve caused my family that night” is one of the best lines ever

@healyn “go take a hike” I’ve never seen such unbridled rage

@citrustwee it's just a messed up thing to receive in the mail

@healyn its literally all i can think of whenever i hear poison. it has broken me

@healyn @citrustwee "go take a hike. love, giuseppe and jillian" slays me every time lol

@remulacfrommars @triz @citrustwee Giuseppe is probably the funniest, kindest person i know irl

@healyn Bet you're no longer invited to their future weddings ever again.

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