Epic Story time.

I have two sinks in the bathroom side by side, with identical two-handle faucets. One of them developed a leak, so I set out to fix it, using materials left from fixing of its brother some months ago.

1. It all starts with a small hidden Allen screw which is usually stuck with scale deposit and requires soaking in vinegar.

2. Vinegar didn't help, went to Home Depot for WD-40 (probably wrong choice, but decided to try).


3. WD-40 didn't help, decided to try brute force, ripped off the hexagonal head of the screw.

4. Went to Home Depot for a screw extractor and also picked up some anti corrosion solution.

5. Soaked overnight, tried to extract the screw — it didn't budge.

6. More drilling and more brute force with the screw extractor — ripped off the thread on the extractor, but the remains of the screw still hold the casing in place, and it's impossible to extract it.


7. Called a handyman who looked outside the box and told me to not bang my head against the screw and just replace the whole faucet. It's 10+ years old.

8. I need to identical faucets for two sinks.

9. Went to Home Depot and out of dozens of faucets found *one* model that a) would fit and b) is not stupidly short.

(By the way, what is it with this modern trend of short faucets where you need to push you hands into the sink's back side to catch some water?)


10. They only had one faucet left, even though their System said there should be three.

11. Bought the one they had and ordered a second one to be delivered, possibly from another store (I didn't care from where).

11. After the order didn't arrive in two days, called customer support.

12. The robot informed me my order "has been canceled, what else can we do for you?"

13. Pushed through to talk to a human, who didn't know the reason for cancellation.


(One day before.)

11.1. Spent an evening installing the new faucet. Compared to my plumbing memories from Soviet Union this stuff is EASY!

11.2. Except for the drain part. Too many moving parts and a lot of messing with sealant. Fun fact, I used the sealant I brought with from Moscow 10 years ago 🙂

(Back to present.)

14. The support human offered to re-order it for me only to find out they don't sell these faucets anymore.

(Ominous awkward pause.)


15. Oh, but they do sell them, but only as a two-pack. The obvious solution: dismantle the one I already installed, return it to the store, get a two-pack instead. (Yay, Ivan gets to remove *and* install the faucet one extra time!)

16. Only… The two-pack is out of stock too (I'm still on the phone with the support human.) I bought *the last normal faucet* in the entire Home Depot retail network.

17. Still, I can return it and find a different one.


18. Wife looked at the problem outside the box and didn't believe it was the last faucet in the universe, so we looked in other places.

19. Lowe's doesn't carry them, but Amazon does!

20. Ordered one (hopefully identical) faucet from Amazon, delivery expected on Monday. Waiting…


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