Born in 1989. Reluctant businessman. Gujarati. Foodie. Lazy. Rebellious. Passionate about reading, cricket, chess, badminton, movies & public speaking. Prefer discussion over arguments. Intolerant about plenty of stuff that my Toots might explain better.
So far the experience here has been good & hopefully it gets better with you all.
Decided to stay away from politics & not tweet/toot anything regarding that. Its only the second day, its tough to look away once you know whats happening & that our nation needs every minor voice to oppose some really evil heads right now but personally there is a little less anguish & sadness inside the mind. Selfish?! Yes. But mental peace matters & one random day we just know the limit.
It feels so dark.
I actually went to a temple today just to seek some peace. But a part of me seems to know this is the end. The last parts of this story won't be happy. Am aware of it but still, it doesnot make it easier to face this time. I actually prayedto God to just end it soon & show me some mercy.
I don't know much ways to die that look accidental. Someday I might snap & do something thats an obvious suicide which will bring social pressure on my family. Brother is yet to marry. So for that sake alone I hope my death looks accidental. Life didnot give me any real accomplisent. Maybe in death I could do some good if I manage to find a good way out.
Something feels really off..
I know my life is not a big deal, surprised am trying to fight my suicidal thoughts since so long now. I know its not a fight I will win in the long run. And deep down it hurts to face the truth that I might have just seen my last birthday yesterday. Its not something anyone I know for real can understand. Its the sadness with which I will die, thts hurting me.
NDTV is overrated. Ravish Kumar kindof gives them a "fair" news vibe in speaking for the voiceless ; but thats about all they have. The amount of trash on NDTV is very much reaching the level of other "pretend-news" channels. It kindof defines why India is doomed, the most mainstream so-called "fearless" news channel is just marginally less sold out than others.
Rebel. Passionate about reading, movies & cricket.
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