*slaps top of Ted Cruz*
this bad boy can hold so many unsolved murders spanning the 60's to 70's!
@jackdaw_ruiz conspiracy theory: ted cruz killed the dog everyone thinks mike huckabee’s kid offed, and huckabee’s kid was the zodiac killer
. . . brb running out to WinCo for push pins and thread so we can get to mapping out just how deep this goes.
@jackdaw_ruiz The conspiracy theory I hold to ironically was that while everyone was focused on Ted Cruz being a serial killer, Tim Kaine had a cabin he was skinning hitchhikers in.
@jackdaw_ruiz And he was so utterly boring during the campaign, you know something had to be wrong with him.
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