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Jakobpunkt🔥 @jakobpunkt@mastodon.social

Slipped on the ice on my way home from swing and gave myself a truly spectacular bruise on my elbow. It's squishy to the touch, but I have full range of motion and it's not too painful, so I think it's only bruised. I have been diligent about alternating ice and heat for the last hour, moving the joint a lot, and I took a naproxen. There is no way I'm allowing anything to slow me down this weekend.

I failed at sitting out. Worth it.

Maybe I'll just go for a little bit and not dance too much. Lots of people sit out in swing and just enjoy the music. I don't really get it, but it gives me cover this time.

I really want to go swing dancing tonight but also I am exhausted and my throat is sore and I have a whole weekend of dancing coming up. The sensible thing to do is stay home. But that makes me :(

My throat feels scratchy and my eyes feel hot. No. This will not stand.

cat: ?
me: IT'S A KITTY!
cat: ??
me: AREN'T YOU A GOOD LITTLE KITTY? YES YOU ARE, YOU'RE ALL SOFT AND FLOOFY
cat: ...
me: I WANT TO GIVE YOU ALL THE PETS AND SCRITCHES
cat: *walks off*

dog: !!!!!!!!!!!!
me: oh shit whats up
dog: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
me: that rules my bud
dog: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
me: do you want to get pet
dog: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I realized this morning that I have accidentally memorized the entirety of the Hamilton opening track. I think the fact that that was possible is a testament to how well it flows.

me: i hate human beings so much yall are the worst

also me: we should all just talk about our feelings and be nicer to each other

yoga, nausea Show more

Customer: can I have a kazoo?
Me: we don't sell them, unfortunately. You could try over at-
Customer: I just heard you playing one!
Me: that
Me: uh
Me: Christ
Me: that was me making silly mouth sounds, I don't uh
Customer, looking very unconvinced: that was you.
Me: yeah I uh
Me: I mean
Me: Careless Whisper came on and I couldn't help myself
Me, absolutely fucking scarlet: *demonstrates the noise again so she can see I'm really really not hiding a kazoo*

A preposition is a fine thing to end a sentence with.

<< "In the end we decided not to colonize Mars, despite having the technology to do so, because the timezone support would be too complicated" -Elon Musk, 2020 >>

reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/c

I blocked my first mastodooter. I think that's a milestone of some kind?

( ' ᵛ ' ) *ᵇᵒʳᵇ ʳᵒˡˡ*
 ( ‹:)
  ( ̩ ‸ ̩)
   (:› )
    ( ' ᵛ ' )
     ( ‹:)
      ( ̩ ‸ ̩)
       (:› )
        ( ' ᵛ ' )
         ( ‹:)
          ( ̩ ‸ ̩)
           (:› )
           \( ' ᵛ ' )/

I have reached the age where phone conversations with my parents consist almost entirely of questions and answers about various people's ailments, injuries, and medical interventions.