Pinned toot

The GenX equivalent of "a deadhead sticker on a Cadillac" is a Nine Inch Nails sticker on Prius.

In Oregon we don't really have good bagels. Whenever I visit, bagels are an important priority.

My jam is the salt bagel with sun-dried tomato cream cheese.

People are scared of New Yorkers, but it's really not fair. Sure, this girl in front of me just ordered an untoasted cinnamon raisin bagel with bacon, egg and cheese. But we're not *all* deeply broken and terrifying! Most of us are really nice!

I hope the international spy ring that ransacked my 5yo's room found what they were looking for. They were very thorough, from the looks of it.

Sometimes I'm not sure it's good that I can get the answer to literally anything I can think to ask.

Kiddo (being sarcastic): oh if someone has poverty, they must deserve it

Me: you just said what a lot of people actually believe

Kiddo: really?

Me: yeah, a lot of people think if you're poor it's because you did something to deserve it

Kiddo: I will punch them before they infect me

Changing random stuffs in your code until your program works is hacky and bad practice.

But if you do it fast enough, it becomes machine learning and earns you 4x your current wages.

If you're over 40 and don't wake up in some kind of pain, you almost certainly died in your sleep.

The enemy of my enemy turns out to be kind of an asshole.

Sure, Nobel prizes are great, but have you ever been branded "The Antichrist" by hard right christian conservatives?

Bitmojis don't generally look like the person that made them, but they speak *volumes* about how that person perceives themselves. 

I wonder if a remote employee has ever been kidnapped in the middle of a video call.

Once a middle aged woman in line in front of me at Home Depot got irate and they paged "Becky, Karen or any available manager" and I just ran into the parking lot before what I assume was some kind of matter/antimatter explosion.

I once got an email demanding I send money to a bitcoin account or they would send nudes of me to my parents and my employer.

There are no such pictures, but if there were, I assure you the only people who would pay to suppress them are the would-be recipients.

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