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I hope the international spy ring that ransacked my 5yo's room found what they were looking for. They were very thorough, from the looks of it.

@jabsonik "Sigh. Freedom. Yay." pretty much sums up the Mastodon experience, doesn't it…

Sometimes I'm not sure it's good that I can get the answer to literally anything I can think to ask.

@persephone The resemblance is uncanny, really. Particularly how the top gleams in the light.

Kiddo (being sarcastic): oh if someone has poverty, they must deserve it

Me: you just said what a lot of people actually believe

Kiddo: really?

Me: yeah, a lot of people think if you're poor it's because you did something to deserve it

Kiddo: I will punch them before they infect me

@vesperto Getting all the old birdsite content I was happy with over here because I like you all better.

If you're over 40 and don't wake up in some kind of pain, you almost certainly died in your sleep.

The enemy of my enemy turns out to be kind of an asshole.

Sure, Nobel prizes are great, but have you ever been branded "The Antichrist" by hard right christian conservatives?

Bitmojis don't generally look like the person that made them, but they speak *volumes* about how that person perceives themselves. 

Of COURSE I have an example.

I wonder if a remote employee has ever been kidnapped in the middle of a video call.

Once a middle aged woman in line in front of me at Home Depot got irate and they paged "Becky, Karen or any available manager" and I just ran into the parking lot before what I assume was some kind of matter/antimatter explosion.

I once got an email demanding I send money to a bitcoin account or they would send nudes of me to my parents and my employer.

There are no such pictures, but if there were, I assure you the only people who would pay to suppress them are the would-be recipients.

Jesus Christ Supercats: A mashup of Jesus Christ Superstar and Cats. Biblical characters as anthropomorphic cats. Half the songs from each show. In the end, Jesus is crucified, then ascends on the spaceship to the Heaviside Layer.

I just overheard someone who speaks English as a second language refer to their Apple branded tablet computer as an "eepid" and I am calling it that from now on.

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