I think there's some sort of metaphor here, but I can't quite put my finger on it.
---
RT @IranIntl_En
Kylie Moore-Gilbert, a British-Australian citizen who spent 2 years in an prison for no crime, essentially as a hostage, has tweeted that the handcuffs they put on them were stamped:
MADE IN UK. @KMooreGilbert
twitter.com/IranIntl_En/status

Well, this has broken me. Absolutely broken me.
---
RT @DocMartineau
Gabriella's appearance at the end has me in tears. No child or family should have to go through this. We will all keep Nazanin in the spotlight until she's home. This is just beautifully put together, thank you @emmihowell twitter.com/HowellProd/status/
twitter.com/DocMartineau/statu

OMG Scottish Tories! You'll never believe what's happened! The leader of a country has been accused of misleading Parliament! We all know how strongly you feel about that. Start the petition, lads, we're right behind you. independent.co.uk/news/uk/poli

Hey, if there was an infinite amount of food and no predators, so could I.
---
RT @qikipedia
Female aphids can reproduce asexually, so do not require a male. If there was an infinite amount of food and no predators, a single female could create enough young to cover the Earth in a layer of aphids 149km deep in one year.
twitter.com/qikipedia/status/1

Re the whole thing. It's not true and it never was. This is the kind of stupid roadblock that they desperately throw at us, in an attempt to force us to discuss absurdity rather than continue to fight for equality and respect. Don't get distracted. Stay on target.
---
RT @Hasbro
Hold that Tot โ€“ your main spud, MR. POTATO HEAD isnโ€™t going anywhere! While it was announced today that the POTATO HEAD brand name & logo are dropping tโ€ฆ
twitter.com/Hasbro/status/1365

They can't simultaneously call us a banana republic and also say that we're allergic to fruit. Pick a lane, lads.
---
RT @ruth_wishart
Not just (predictably) Andrew Neil but now Justin Webb on @BBCr4today uses the ludicrous and pejorative phrase "banana republic" in a discussion about Scotland. Shoddy journalism, given the kid glove treatment afforded Westminster's transgressions.
twitter.com/ruth_wishart/statu

Gawd bless you, teachers. I have spent about an hour today homeschooling one single child, and I'm staring into the eyes of madness. Christ knows how you manage entire days with thirty of the fuckers.

Every year, Gregg's death feels more meaningless. What a pointless, pointless loss. And yet, in a way, his death had more impact on us all than his life ever did.
---
RT @michaellegge
9 years.
twitter.com/michaellegge/statu

What an awful, awful day Sarah has had, but watching the entire comedy community instantly rally round on this is giving me tingly feelings.
---
RT @felicityward
@sarahbennetto Anyone who reads this, Sarahโ€™s Kofi account is: ko-fi.com/sarahbennetto

If you got some spare pounds, dollars, cash, throw it her way. Sheโ€™s a very good, kind, eternally generous person.
twitter.com/felicityward/statu

Don't you tease me, you sentient haystack. Enough with your "could"s and "should"s. I'll believe it when my arse has gone numb from a badly-upholstered Guiness-stained stool and not before.
---
RT @chortle
Comedy clubs could be back on May 17 | Boris Johnson unveils roadmap for releasing Covid restrictions zpr.io/Rfb58
twitter.com/chortle/status/136

I know we're all in lockdown right now and orbiting the event horizon of genuine underpants-on-the-head madness, so pinch of salt and all that, but I'm watching the highlights of landing and I'm literally crying with joy.

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