Pinned toot

please do not send me nudes i do not want your nudes i have nowhere to put them my room is a mess (platonic hog pics acceptable)

Pinned toot
Pinned toot

*to the tune of the Nationwide jingle*
Bigfoot Tried to Eat My Ass ™

Pinned toot

i boost the toot, the toot i boost, upon the boosted toot i roost

"10/10, would suck cocks in hell" - Karras' mother's yelp review for pazuzu

sexual content, religion 

"leave room for jesus!"

uh yeah no shit Margery why do you think i'm gaping my asshole like this?

Continually pissed off that A Mighty Wind is such a good, hilarious movie that gets completely ruined by the transphobic joke they slap on the very end for absolutely no reason.

Boats and Hoes, take me home
To the place, I belong
West Virginia, mountain mama
Take me home, boats and hoes

This much I know is true:
that God blessed the Boats and Hoes
That led me straight to you

occasional reminder that a country that doesn't allow felons to participate in voting has a vested interest in locking up political dissidents.

is it gay to thicken? It's literally becoming thicker (in the sense of wider). 😔

ah yes, the humble “like”

the proletarian’s “boost”

every time you type out a reply to someone else’s toot and then delete it without posting, your powers increase twofold. my IQ is currently in orbit around Saturn and it’s too late to stop me

we hold these truths to be self-evident: kill all men, kill all white people

me interacting with people’s posts: haha this is great! you rock, what a fun time

me viewing people’s profiles: okay wow so actually you are good looking and attractive, we are enemies now. fuck of, i hate u

i voted for jill stein to own the libs BEFORE it was cool

never really paid attention to the Twilight series beyond being somewhat familiar with the plot and having seen one and a half(?) of the movies, but I’ve recently learned that one of the “good guy” vampires was a fucking Confederate soldier?????? What in gods fuck is going on here

let he who is without kidneys, pass the first stone

i donot believe in ghosts, except for farts, which are the ghost of poos

reposting this one for the longtime fans:

help, help, my entire ass fell off, please, help

@finn posting about posting something is not materially different than posting it; this is known as the poster’s dilemma,

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