My least favorite part about new folks logging in is the DM panic.

โ€œOh no, my DMs are unencrypted and can be read by the instance moderators and admins.โ€

โ€œ... just like every other social platform youโ€™ve ever used, plus most email platforms.โ€

โ€œWell, yeah, but on those other platforms the admins are a team of underpaid entry level employees at a faceless company, not a single person or small group of individuals thatโ€™s I can get to knowโ€

โ€œ...right.โ€

Please don't post screenshots of hateful messages. I've blocked these people for a reason. I don't want to see their hatred.

Let's not import that awful Twitter culture in here, please.

Navel Gazing About Ennui 

I've been in such a state of having to do maximum work to just accomplish survival, that now, when I have breathing space, I don't do anything. But I know I have things I can do, and want to do, and that makes me anxious, and builds up the internal resistance to starting anything still further. Enumerating Things That Can Be Done as Projects helps build a sense of scale and enable movement, but how do you make "Write something" a project with definiable tasks and scale?

I dislike flip-flops, but I live in Florida. I solved this with slip on Sanuk shoes, but after 5 years, the sole wore through, and they've been getting holes. I wanted something more breathable, so I got Chacos on clearance a bit ago. My wife hates them, and a specific hat that I have that I love. I can avoid wearing the hat, but those are my only sandals lol.

Also, we decided that Milo Ventamiglia would have made a better Edward. He had the angry brooding down.

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I just watched a 3 hour version of Twilight, and legit could explain the extra time except that maybe the staring and pauses were longer? Highlight is still Decode by Paramore. They used to make good musicโ€ฆ

Giving money to your admin to keep things running or to the Mastodon project are great ways to give back and help your community.

Giving money to support individual users on Mastodon who need money and resources is just as if not more helpful and important.

Support the poor in your community. Pay the artists. Spread the resources around. Make this place as healthy and punk rock as possible.

โค๏ธ

I feel reasonably productive today, and I haven't actually done much. I really need to get registered for teacher training.

You might think that someone who complains is having a bad time while someone who is quiet is having a good time.

It's the opposite.

Someone who complains:

* believes that what they are doing is worth complaining about
* believes that they are worthy of better circumstances
* feels a sense of agency over their environment

Someone who is quiet:

* doesn't believe what they're doing is worth complaining about
* doesn't believe they're worthy of better circumstances
* feels powerless

Hey . When you post pictures, please please please with puppies on top fill in that description box for the visually impaired. You will be helping us out tremendously. We want to enjoy your pictures as much as others do. You don't have to write a novel, but just fill in some details.

Thanks with much love:
A Blind Dude

First day in a bit I haven't had to leave the house with the kids for most of the day. I count that as a victory. Got a bit of unpacking done, but we're at the point where we need more furniture to unpack more. Well, mostly. So, until we get more cash, we just have some boxes left.

request of stockholm area mastodon people, food 

So, I really want to try this Halloumi burger at Swedish Burger King. I'll be at Arlanda Airport on Monday, August 20th, but I only have a two hour layover. I'm willing to pay someone in the Stockholm area to bring me this sandwich, if possible.

Financial issues/GoFundMe 

Hey, so my family has a GoFundMe going right now, we had to move cross country because of housing costs and jobs. We're set up in the new place, but the new job hasn't paid my wife yet, and we're basically tapped out. We had just enough money to get here and get the basics. But now we have to make car payments, and keep up on our debt reconciliation, and pay cell and electric bills on the old place. I'd appreciate any help or shares! gofundme.com/curia039s-return-

ADN Finder Update:

* Support for Mastodon!
* Improved search (enter your favorite Mastodon instance URL to see a list of users)
* Wider layout

If you've already listed your account, ping me with your Mastodon user name, and I'll add it to your profile.

adnfinder.herokuapp.com

Of my over 100,000 followers on various social media I had to lose due to harassment, maybe 5 followed me here.

You will have to rebuild. You will meet better people and learn new things.

It's worth it. But you'll definitely have to do some work to find your people.

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Instance that doesn't list who their admin is (like, a person not a logo that makes posts)? Skip it.

Instance that has over 30,000 users? Probably not a cohesive community.

Instance with open sign-ups? You better pray they have a 24 hour on-call mod system.

Instance that doesn't block shitty instances? Have fun with that.

If you aren't vulnerable to abuse, then none of this matters. But if you want something better than Twitter or FB or whatever, you need to do a bit of work.

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This doesn't mean that self-hosted, small communities are safer.

But it does mean you have less of a barrier for knowing what you are getting into. You can know exactly who your admin is, why they decided to host an instance, exactly who your mods are, etc.

Or you can host yourself if you have the money/knowhow.

There is no easy fix for weeding out bad actors in the Fediverse. But there are fixes. So either you need to do the work yourself or find someone you trust to do it for you.

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I've told this story before but listen.

I once had my email and everything hacked into years ago. It turns out it was some dude who worked for the hosting company my job used for everything including my private website hosting. It was a big company.

Dude still used his company computer to do it. He was some self-professed amateur photog and saw my cosplay and modeling stuff and got obsessed.

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