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video of my talk just went up! (scroll down and you'll see me, blurb, and the video) It was a week ago and there were a couple of people on here who missed it and kindly said they'd like to see. 🌸

It's all about people's goals and how we pursue them or not in light of current world changes. ...Goals, Pivotal Moments, and Us

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Ooooh ! I've integrated my blog with Mastodon, so toots appear as comments! this is my blog's mastodon address: @laura and you'll see it just did a toot! Oooh! If you want to follow my blog and comment/discuss via Mastodon it can now happen.

Thanks to @saper for the idea, and hooray that I could figure it out! Small victories! 🌸

(2 min read, 4 minute listen. Trigger warning – death mention)

Sometimes I wake up in the night. Someone recently asked me if I get enough sleep. I said yes. I lied. I think I burn bright – sometimes like a candle, sometimes a star, sometimes a wildfire, and then when I’m consumed I sleep hard. And when you’re in that creative flow of ideas, who wants to turn out the light?

Last night at some ungodly hour – before the dawn, but it looked like the dawn as the full moon was out – I was thinking and there were sounds and words in my head, and there was something about that moon that triggered a memory – and when the morning did come I went searching for an old recording. I’ve never shared it. There are lots of things I’ve never shared, and that’s interesting because I’m writing about perceptions – worries, fears, our minds – and how things get in our way and stop us doing things sometimes. They stop the #YesICan. So I am sharing this. It’s a shame it comes some 11 years after the guy in the video with me passed. (damn you, Mark)

People don’t really leave us though, do they?

Mark and I would record stuff – for hours. We spent hours. Sometimes there would be no talking at all, just playing and then maybe a frantic scribble of a fragment on paper, and, well some more playing. A friend of his from London recorded this as part of some educational project I think – I don’t even know his name. This video was one of the last things Mark gave to me – this and a copy of a piece called Ave Verum that we did and redid, and he finally finished early in 2009. I lost that CD, and I still look for it in the hopes that I’ll find it one day.

I was his string orchestra for years. I never really knew where the stuff I did ended up – he did something for National Geographic about mongooses and there was a film score and various music tracks. We both burned like candles and went for hours. Listening, playing, – just one more line – maybe I could be a violin this time, or use another bow, or different vibrato to sound like more people? Yep, why not? (just after 2 mins here you can hear all the cellos. -the violin-cellos too. I’m the strings.)


I don’t know why today I thought of you so strongly, Mark, but really – damn you for leaving. You taught me an awful lot and got me to do a lot of musical letting go and just being. I think you knew that. I’m sure you did. I’m telling the world on your behalf anyway. Those were good days, or nights rather, and I don’t think I slept enough then either.

There are so many wonderful people who come into our lives and leave footprints. It is good to remember them when they are gone, but I’m reminded more so than ever to celebrate them now.

today on a walk, at the edge of a field there was a sudden outburst of a carpet of daisies!

Suddenly, daisies!

last night's sunset, with me (selfie taken by balancing the phone on an empty bench)

as of tonight we have no fridge or freezer. Kaput. Looks like we can get one Friday, but in the meantime, we'll be eating some odd meals, all at 7am.

2 bags of once frozen peas, a gallon of lovely summer fruits, a loaf of various breads, ... wasn't quite my lockdown plan. Fortunately we had just about cleared out the fridge as tomorrow was *supposed* to be our weekly shopping day.

looks like that will wait until Friday... *sigh*

Last night there was the most beautiful sunset, and I rested at the water's edge and let the sound of lapping water and the evening glow bathe me. Somehow it washed all the struggle of the day away and was a little big perfect.

paper submitted on time! Thank you to those of you who took the time to read and comment - I made improvements because of you!


Political reference - positive rally sabotage via Tik Tok 

SO HAPPY about the tik tok effort to book out the unspeakable rally in America. THERE IS HOPE FOR CHANGE!

so good to wake up to good news!!

would anyone like to read a draft of my 'Practice of Praxis' article? I hope to submit it in a day or so... to the Otessa journal. (It would then undergo peer review and there's no guarantee it would be accepted.)

(it's just over 5.5k words without references - just so you know what you'd be in for. 😉 )

today the dawn crept in while the night slept.

This was at 3:58am. and yes, the birds were singing.

@Downes I love what YOU say about wisdom in your newsletter. (I'm sure the post is worth reading but I like your intro)

wise words if ever I did hear any. :)

Just joined the Equality and Diversity group at my uni

Time to raise some voices!

this morning the light was louder than the birds. Who can resist a call like that? (even at 5am?)

today I'm leading the first of three 90 min zoom cello technique classes as part of a 3-day sort of online string teachers training course. I am obviously nervous as it keep me up planning late late, and woke me early early. zoom. all online. Well there are instant interaction challenges for starters- especially with musicians, and then there are some people planning to 'watch later' which means it will be a show instead of a class. tricky. I'll be glad when day 1 is done and dusted.

I have officially slept enough!!!

That means waking up with lightning shooting out of my eyes has resumed 🤩 Watch out world!

the waiting time... between having cooked and waiting for the baking to finish....


it's been a gray day, with well needed rain and rest. - both very good.

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