intro post since people are doing these: i'm 21, aries, intp, i study literature, and i'm part of a bunch of small fandoms about people doing the bad murders
sometimes i rant about music, esp prog rock/metal. carla kihlstedt cleared my skin and healed my crops.
i dont really understand kin but ive had several people tell me im basically lorne malvo kin lol
pic for attention
it's painful to think about the things i had and the things that i don't now. i'd make my own perfect community but i know it would implode just like the rest. what's the point. people get so heated over shit. i can't trust anyone and i feel ill thinking about the shit that's happened - before i could even see it coming
anyways im a really silly person who likes to look back on past communities i can no longer rejoin without compromising like... my morals, my truth, other people's trust in me, etc etc etc
but i feel deeply lonely in the sense that i had a hole that used to be filled by our shared hobby and i miss it.
i miss it so much and i dont know how to ask for it from the friends i have kept from that context. i dont know how to like. get back in contact with the people who were involved
(13-yr-old me's otp would have been kaiba/yami, i think,)
i probably would have been less self-conscious! so at the time, it would have been great. i'm sure i would have made good friends in the fandom.
but also, good GOD, the web trail of hawt yaoiz xD that would have been attributed to my name, stuck there on fanfiction.net
i'd honestly love to play one competently but anything that requires strategy and my head is out the window. it can't be found. i love the IDEA of being good at magic or hearthstone or whatever. but unless there's a way to do the thing i do in fighting games (which is mash buttons) but with online card games i'm pretty fucked
lit student who drinks too much tea, writes terrible fic and listens to trash
fandoms: fx fargo, brba/bcs, overwatch, villainous, hotline miami
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