EZRA 🥀 @magpietongue@mastodon.social

welp forgot to make this followers only but whatever this is masto it’s the wild wooly west

i was??? flirted with???? while buying a sports bra at Old fucking Navy

the hot, green-haired cashier caught my eye, tilted her head back slightly & said “you wanna, ah...stick it in?” when it was time for me to pay with my motherfucking chip card friends i TURNED RED & like choke-laughed & she gave some half-assed “oh gosh i just meant, don’t mind me” & then she complimented my clothes i die

today's irresponsible* purchases: metallic green lipstick & a plush purple narwhal squishy toy

*tiny nuggets of happiness mined from the mountain of shit that is 2018

but damn everything really does move at a ridiculous pace now. communities can form & implode overnight. terminology can shift multiple times in a day. this doesn't have to be a bad thing but it sure is a thing we have to navigate & a thing that younger people are navigating way more than i ever had to

like don't get me wrong i have a general "live & let live" policy for folks who are just doing their thing non-aggressively, many people on tumblr are teenagers, everybody's mentally ill and/or neurodivergent (including me). i'm SURE there are folks who think at least some of my interests & identities are absolutely batshit. i'm allowed to think some of the things i come across are total BS without deciding it's my job to Stop Them

i have been Online for well over two decades & i thought i'd seen it all

but tumblr just keeps outdoing itself

like what is WRONG with people

why the fuck would any of these groups reblog an entirely unrelated series of glitter gifs

why are some of these even a THING

like i am well aware of many varieties of kink bullshit & honestly i don't give a fuck as long as you keep your shit private & it's consensual! but uh what are these """""non-kink"""""" communities & why. how. why

somebody i follow reblogged a gif "stimboard" of like. glittery stuff with a Monster High character in the middle & i was like "oh okay neato this is pretty" & then i scrolled down

the bottom of the post was a banner with "NO _____" & a whole fuckin slew of acronyms, half of which i had never seen in my life

i had to look them up i had to do it

i'm dying now please bury me very far away