So has the excitement died down? Is this more the way it was before I showed up? I should probably find more regulars to follow.
Many of the people I followed on here in my two week fury of Mastodon participation have already stopped tooting. 😕
Fun time hanging out with friends tonight, but now I'm already home watching Bill Nye on Netflix. Being 40something kinda sucks.
Feeling a little better now.
But right now I just want to lay on the futon in my office and sleep and nope and maybe cry. At least I'm not thinking about killing myself again, so I'm not at my worst. I really need to see a therapist.
I went nearly two months without a major depressive episode. I was starting to feel "cured." Yet here we are again. I've had this thing following me for 30 years and I know I'll probably never beat it, I'll just need to learn to live with it somehow. For starters I'll probably need to start coworking again. I need to start running again. I need to stop drinking. Ugh.
I’ve had a hard time staying focused for the past couple of days, but at least I’m being minimally productive and not getting depressed. It might not sound like much but it’s kind of a big deal for me.
I'm officially a free agent! If you're looking for a backend or full stack dev, let me know! My experience is primarily Ruby & Rails, but mostly I care about making stuff that solves real problems with awesome people who are empathetic and empowered. Let me know if that's your company!
Wham. Depression. Had been doing so fucking well for months. Hit me outta nowhere.
Was Ariana Grande born yet back when the Four Non Blondes song she blatantly ripped off when popular?
Sure, let's watch an episode of Black Mirror OH MY GOD I HATE THIS WORLD I HATE HUMANS WE'RE ALL HORRIBLE AND THIS IS REALLY GONNA HAPPEN.
Contemporary American Socialists should resurrect the term "bootlicker." Glorifying working oneself to death in the U.S. needs to stop.