"barmtemder, gimme your lomgest glass and fill it with whimskeym. It's beem a loooomg day"

looking forward to spending the next three weeks picking up the last of the glass using my bare feet

Ah nothing like picking up 10 lbs of glass at 1AM on a Tuesday

Woah, my glass table suddenly shattered into a million pieces. I was sitting on the couch, not even touching it. What could have caused this...?

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