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my new racket is a fitness program marketed towards incels and middle-aged cishet men which involves them repeatedly punching their balls in order to 'shake stagnated testosterone loose' and 'improve overall testicular fitness by raising environmental stress'

I want to buy Verso's Companion to Capital and Im comfortable buying from them bc they're not a big big company and they support writers I enjoy but I don't feel okay putting pressure on mail workers with a non essential package :/

So, I just read the words "analprint scan" on a nature article. How's your day going?

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you ever think about how people have probably been roasting each other since forever? like, peasants in 12th century feudal thuringia were probably all like "Ho, Berinon! The coarse and loutish stone in yonder field doth bear a semblance to thy own character! Surely, you and he are distant kin?"

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Bad news everyone, turns out this year I'm the April fool. I will be in the town square tonight to receive your beatings and mockery

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the farmer from babe (1996) was nominated for an oscar for best supporting actor, despite being very much the lead human actor in the film.

i take this to mean that the 48 different pigs who played babe would have been eligible for the best actor award, had they collectively put in a better performance

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So the sun just gives us free energy 24/7? Sounds like a scam. Its probably stealing our data

♪ I am the seed, I am the green, I am the rain ♪
♪ I am the cow that's eating me ♪
♪ But I don't mind 'cause I see that him and her ♪
♪ And we and they and he and she are all me ♪

Why can't I find any cute stickers. Failed nation

Financial crisis, unemployment 

Unemployment in the US hits 3.28M. not even the worst predictions hit that number. That's 4x the biggest amount unemployment of all time.

COVID-19, politics, Mississippi 

The Mississippi governor has issued an executive order overriding local govs 'stay in place' orders and declaring most business, including all department stores, airports and factories, essential, therefore lifting restrictions on social gatherings

There's something Freudian about how liberals see the president as a dad

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Shareable document version, Housebound advice from a long-term housebound person, boosts ok 

Here's a free downloadable zine version of this thread, edited a little, with contributions from others. It's released under a sharealike noncommercial license, so please feel free to pass it on to anyone you think might find it useful. ❤️
drive.google.com/open?id=19FIH

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I goddamn hope police isnt getting a cut of fines leveled at people not "social distancing"

Covid19, gripes w/ snitches 

What exactly do people gain from calling the cops on people outside? Why do people assume all groups are not social distancing, when they could all be living together, so there's no point distancing when outside if you're not doing it at home.

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My DM: Please stop trying to make the goblins cute.
Me: I put a little top hat on her and she loves it.

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re: covid, xr, ecofascism, advocating genocide 

@warden @queeranarchism XR has made a point of allowing ecofascists in their spaces, just as long as they don't go "off-message". Gail Bradbrook, one of its founders, has spoken at length on her thoughts on "overpopulation". Roger Hallam has repeatedly attempted to blockade Dover on brexit day, using a thinly-veiled reference to the 14 words.

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