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All right, folks, for once I don't have a bunch of emails to deal with, I'm waiting for a couple important deliveries, and I've beaten around this particular bush long enough.

The 🇵🇷 sayings thread begins now.

Update: your boy is now waiting to hear whether he’ll get an interview

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your boy may have just applied for a job doing outreach for minor league ballplayers

your boy may want this job harder than he's wanted anything since the job he currently has

Now, of course, anyone can make one prediction and be right.

Dro, like all Gaceta employees, goes above and beyond.

clips.twitch.tv/CloudySoftVamp

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Isidro isn't what you'd call a sedate announcer, but this moment is a little much even for him.

That's because, apparently, he's a goddamn psychic.

clips.twitch.tv/BoldImpossible

love too pass two schools that, by hanging a sign that said “thank you, teachers” outside their buildings, did more than my workplace did during Teacher Appreciation Week

the fuckin administrative assistant for the dean of students had to thank us out of the goodness of her heart because our spineless pezzonovante of a boss didn’t feel like it, despite asking us to thank administrative personnel on their day

not that I would’ve believed him anyway, but 😡

covid 

It's super cool and awesome that we're already talking about people still taking precautions for their health as though they're paranoid or have brain worms, and moving ahead with fully going back to normal such as we really ever stopped, when we are extremely still in the thick of it and looking set to fail to ever reach the necessary vaccination levels to stop community spread, love this extremely normal country!!

RIGHT NOW:
You want to hear me and @Louisa talk (fictional) (1885) (Puerto Rican) baseball?

Good, we want you to hear us. Get in here:

twitch.tv/lnpgaceta

RIGHT NOW:
Join Dro and @Louisa as they bring you the very last night of 1885 #IngenierosRIN :ingenieros: baseball—and Víctor "The Snowman" Nieves' last two games at the plate for the Liga Nacional Puertorriqueña.

First: the #AtléticosSGR :atleticos:
Second: the #ArtesanosLPI :artesanos:

twitch.tv/lnpgaceta

Death Sentance carried out on innocent Ledell Lee 

Still thinking how the deciding vote in the death of an innocent Ledell Lee, who DNA and fingerprints were not at the scene, was decided at the Supreme Court by 5-4 and was Neil Gorsuch's first vote. Just one more innocent life destroyed by our machine of death and racism

If you’re wondering why I need out of my building:

1) today was the last day for seniors, who dedicated the yearbook to the facilities staff, and then, as they ran through the hallways, they threw packaged cheese, hamburgers, and hot dogs everywhere, including grass, cars, hallways, etc.

2) a kid I’ve taught for four years nearly backed up into my car in his truck because he didn’t check anyone was behind him, then drove the wrong way down a one-lane road without stopping for a second

this dog is such a manipulative little turd

also for the record the stuffed manatee is adorable 🥰

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Clark:
- tried to eat the stuffed manatee Orbit got me;
- is currently begging for a treat because he got yelled at for trying to eat the cap to his toothpaste, again

LNP Baseball 

This is very funny to me, especially because no one is engaging with my bullshit whatsoever

The context is my favorite player Victor Nieves being terrible

(Also you can be a part of this Discord by joining, I promise I don't usually bullshit this much patreon.com/lnpgaceta )

no one was wondering if Orlando Martinez was named after the city, Mr Lookouts Announcer, sir

LMAO the Lookouts announcer:

"And that first pitch is *drilled!* Going deep—¡adiós a da baseball! . . . wait, no? It's foul?"

[pause]

"It looked like it was going out of here, but it just bent foul."

[long pause]

"Am I embarrassed? No. I've done it before. It's no big deal."

You should catch me and @Louisa calling baseball games every Friday night for:

- a fictional league;
- in 1885;
- set in a Puerto Rico that became independent in 1868.

Tomorrow, we'll be calling the last two games of the season for the Ingenieros de Rincón, a woeful team whose 42-year-old right fielder is retiring when the year's over.

Join us, won't you? I'm informed we're "delightful," apparently.

allpro.social/@lnpgaceta/10619

I'll be #baseballing for the LNP tomorrow, I was going to say I'm the color commentator because I thought that was the guy who just fucks around but it turns out the color commentator also knows things, so I'm not that

I'm the monochrommentator, and the only hue I paint in is suggesting players should bunt when they absolutely should not

allpro.social/@lnpgaceta/10619

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