I am Groot! ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ is a user on mastodon.social. You can follow them or interact with them if you have an account anywhere in the fediverse. If you don't, you can sign up here.

I am Groot! ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ @peemee@mastodon.social

I've been hearing rumours of a new iPad with USB-C instead of Lightning. One wonders what it'll be called: iPad X; iPad SE or maybe iPad SE-X?

What is the point of filtering languages in Mastodon's preferences WHEN SAID FILTRATION DOES NOT OCCUR?

2.5 hours ago at 1:45pm I arrived at my Mum's home for a visit. I found her on the floor of her bedroom when she'd been for God knows how long since falling out of bed during the night. Might have been 12 hours or more.
She has existing shoulder & back problems so I wasn't going to move her, just make her warm & gently rub her sore spots.
Taken by ambulance to the local hospital by a dedicated team of paramedics, of whom I have nothing but the highest of praise.

Now waiting anxiously for news.

Coffee arrived in record time, usual courier employed. 22.3 hours from shipping to arrival.

Ordered 500 gram bag of Guatemalan medium-roast coffee beans at 7 am today. Six hours later the order had been processed & shipped. It has to travel about 3000 km to get here, previous packages have arrived in 26 hours.

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn't, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.

How do you kill a circus clown?

Go for the juggler!

Me and the wife decided to make our own sex tape, but she was pissed off when I started to hold auditions for her part.

Wanted to buy personalised number plates, but realised I couldnโ€™t afford them. As a result, I have had to change my name to achieve my desired aim. Many thanks. RJ16BJD.

Just been on a diabetes awareness website and it asked me if I accept cookies.

Is that a trick question?

Update: Elon Muskโ€™s Spacecar was just cut off by some asshole in a BMW

Just got the biopsy results. All clear, no cancer or melanoma.

My collection of Macs will be increasing by one; I'm being gifted with a 2001 G3 "Pismo" PowerBook." This was the last G3 PowerBook before the G4 was released. It has a 40 GB HDD with 1 GB of RAM and I'll have the option of fitting a DVD drive in the multi-use bay on the left side of the body.
This was originally a 10-hour battery laptop, this figure being achieved by using an extra battery in the multi-use bay.
It's also coming with a Belkin WiFi card in the AirPort card slot.

Have to call the local water authority in a few hours. Seems the sewer main is blocked. There's hissing noise & a decided wet area around the toilet downpipe.

I used an iOS app called Gemini 2 (by MacPaw, of CleanMyMac fame) to search for duplicates and blurred or otherwise unwanted photos on my iPhone. As that device is connected to every other Photo(s) app in iOS or macOS via the magic of iCloud, I removed 500 out of almost 8800 photos.
The app uses the subscription model with three levels: 3-day trial; $2.99 per month or $16.99 per annum. I chose the 3-day trial & then deleted the app & cancelled the trial because I am cheap.

Due to a factory error, there's a faulty batch of sun cream in the shops.

That's going to cause a lot of red faces.

I was in the supermarket the other day and couldn't work out which pasta I needed to buy.

Then the penne dropped.

My wife has packed her bags and gone!!

Just because of my fetish with touching pasta.

I'm feeling cannelloni right now.

Sorting socks by colour/patter is for the birds. I have lots of odd socks, I'm sure my washing machine teleports the somewhere else - I can never find all the ones I wash.
So when sorting odd socks, thickness & comfort is way more important than mere colour.