You CAN use wifi-dependant Location Services on an Ethernet connected Mac without wifi over-riding the Ethernet connection. Gary Rosenzweig at Macmost.com supplies the answer to this conundrum. macmost.com/how-to-use-locatio

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This morning I went to a meeting of my Premature Ejaculation Support Group.

Turns out it’s tomorrow.

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RenΓ© Descartes walks into a hotel.

He hands the innkeeper three nails and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"

The innkeeper says, "Are you sure you're in the right joke, mate?"

Descartes says, "I think not."

And vanishes.

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If I'm ever on life support, unplug me...

Then plug me back in, see if that works.

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We should've known communism would fail.

There were a lot of red flags.

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Hearing reports that Sting has been kidnapped.

The Police haven't got a lead.

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I told my Mum that I was going to get a map of Italy tattooed on my chest.

She said "you'll have sore Naples, don't be Sicily."

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What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth?

A Flossiraptor.

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I went for an interview at IKEA.

The manager greeted me by saying "come in, make a seat."

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You can't have it both ways: either you're open 7 days per week or you're not. Inconsistencies on a cheese-maker's website, see pics.

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My stalker just threatened to kill herself if I didn't love her back.

It's nice when problems resolve themselves like that.

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After my accident, I woke up in hospital with a sexy nurse standing over me.

She said, "You may not feel anything from the waist down."

"Fair enough," I replied, groping her breasts.

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I asked my waiter: "What's the special of the day?"

"Octopus." he replied.

"Only problem is, it takes 3 hours to cook because it keeps turning the gas off!" he added.

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I'm starting a magic show where the final reveal is me feeling a woman's breasts.

My stage name is going to be David Coppafeel.

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Emergency services iOS app shows a tree down on the corner of my street & the main road, plus another unexplained incident made safe right out thr front of the place. Could be why there’s no power here.

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Gee, what a surprise! Heating, lighting and other main-powered things are down. Relying on iPad & 4G for internet; LED camping lantern for lighting & bush kettle for boiling water for tea/coffee.

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I hate when people ask how I see myself in 2 years.

I don’t have 2020 vision.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It takes two, very tiny people, to screw, in a lightbulb.

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Mastodon

This page describes the mastodon.social instance - wondering what Mastodon is? Check out joinmastodon.org instead! In essence, Mastodon is a decentralized, open source social network. This is just one part of the network, run by the main developers of the project 🐘 It is not focused on any particular niche interest - everyone is welcome as long as you follow our code of conduct!

Hero image by @b_cavello