After going to an agricultural show, suddenly the idea of families being really proud about their 'breeding and taste' seems a little...

... I mean if you really are genetically optimised for deliciousness, certainly it's something, but, maybe don't tell all the neighbours, and if you do, avoid invitations to barbeques

major cities competing against each other for companies by offering decades of tax breaks seems like something that would lead to poor infrastructure, declining healthcare, and homelessness. oh, wait. right. it did.

At midnight, we discovered we had no hot water in the house. I went to the basement to check the water heater, and saw an error code on it.

Friends, it's 2018, and tonight I had to reboot my water heater.

🎵 Workin’ all day, 🎵

🎵 Postin’ all ni— 🎵

okay maybe like one or two toots, posting all night is not tenable

Dear internet, please stop making videos to tell me things that could be adequately explained in one paragraph of text.

To be fair, the *real* reason "turn it off and turn it back on again" works is more interesting than that. It's because systems are complex, and the more changes you make to a system, the less likely it is that the programmer foresaw the exact set of changes that led to whatever configuration it's in at the moment.

Programmers are pretty good at testing state 0 though (i.e. when you turned it on). So returning to that known state usually makes everything better.

girlfriend: actual piece of paper
boyfriend looking back ogling other girl: fermat
other girl: the margin

Trashposting. Just trashpoting. Show more

I'm working on a Gottlieb Haunted House today. It's one of the more ambitious machines of the 1980's. It features EIGHT flippers, spread out over three floors of a haunted house - the attic, ground floor, and cellar. We'll be streaming this on Monday 7:30pm EDT (23:30 UTC) on our Youtube channel at youtube.com/user/PAPApinball. For now here's some pretty pictures. :)

So bofa.lol self-destructed, then.

Good, good.

Some days you octopus-slap the seal, some days the seal octopus-slaps you

game jam idea: you and your partner are thieves hired by someone who owns large gold reserves to steal the prototype kilogram from the vault in which it resides underneath Paris; once he controls it he can change the definition of a kilogram and make his gold more valuable, but when things go wrong on the heist you double-cross him and also accidentally fall in love with your partner

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they're like "wow this is delicious and affordable" and I'm like "thank you for supporting my small independent business"

Is it crazy how saying sentences backwards creates backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?

HOLY SHIT EVERYONE SHUT UP A SECOND, I JUST REALIZED THAT "UMBRAGE" AND "THROWING SHADE" ARE ETYMOLOGICALLY RELATED

the pirate and the mechanic, a story Show more

My Dog's got no nose.

- How does he smell?

With all new SMANCE. Smell enhancing technology for dogs from Ronco. Tired of your dog being the butt of jokes? SMANCE (patent pending) fits neatly and cleanly into the cavity where your dog's nose used to be and comes in a variety of colours making it the most advanced and realistic artificial dog's nose on the market today.

Kids will love the new squeezy range of SMANCE with 6 different tunes to choose from. Turn your dog into the jukebox you alwa

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