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Jenn, Mother of Possums @queenpossum@mastodon.social

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Phone autocorrected “perennial” to “perineal”, and I feel like I need to go back and explain to the person I was texting that I meant “daisies that come back every year”, not “taint daisies”.

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Normal people at the garden center:

“Can I get that normal looking tree with green leaves?”

Me at the garden center:

“Yo, gimme that one with red leaves and black bark called Bloodgod.”
“Ma’am, that’s actually called a Bloodgood.”
“Whatever. Blood for the Bloodgod.”

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Uhhh Shazam looks fun too?

What universe have I sidestepped into where it looks like DC might have two (maybe three!) fun movies in the space of a year?

Uhhhh Aquaman looks really fun? Like, possibly kinda dumb but fun and also Jason Momoa making jokes?

“Hi. We know why you’re blocking ads. But out site doesn’t ask for donations and ads are how we support ourselves...”

*enables ads*

*gets .exe download*

*disables ads*

green booze Show more

It’s important to provide appropriate glassware to go along with your beverage.

this girl sounds like someone I definitely want to get to know (via /r/relationships.txt on :birdsite: )

Goth baby watched a video of flying foxes so this is my new normal.

I have been out of the loop long enough to have missed that there was a (likely) terrible Overboard remake.

*watches Titans trailer*

*sighs for an extremely long time*

Baby just threw his milk cup off the table.

“Team Rocket!”

I think we’ve got a budding anime villain on our hands, here.

Baby keeps saying “Team Rocket” over and over again, presumably because of the big R.

Might be crying over a network family sitcom right now.

This episode of Black-ish about Bow’s PPD is some Real Big Mood.

Baby started dancing along with a tap routine on TV, and then of course, stopped dancing literally the moment I hit record on my camera.

You ever just follow Junji Ito on Snapchat

I want to eat the fuck out of this Indian/Southern fusion food this dude on Master Chef is making.