That's the thing about games critics. I keep getting older, and they keep staying the same age.

Show thread

The best part about accidentally finding yourself looking up articles on Critical Distance is finding that the same assholes are curating the same shitty articles by the same assholes from the same shitty B-student at a shitty grad school perspective.

Today my boss promoted me to sous chef.

thc chat 

@brass@monsterpit.net miss you too buddy. Looking forward for chatting and sending you a new video :) hope everything is good.

thc chat 

@brass@monsterpit.net goddammit Mitch I've taught you better than this; the correct pun is "Potreon".

@emptyfortress also I'm not familiar with this site! Looking forward to reading some more of it. There's this one game I've been trying to find--a text adventure called Real Life that I played when I was too young where you have all of these encounters and adventures in a city, gay sex being among them. If you remember the ending of Zest where you die and God condemns you to hell, that was lifted off of the death ending from that game. It's too hard to search for for me.

@emptyfortress oh my god. I want to play this. I would definitely do some coverage. Hell, I half want to do a remake where you have to defeat the evil lord Ekim Ecnep. This is amazing. Thank you for sharing :) have we checked with @dosnostalgic about it? things are good in Portland. Been working like crazy. The boyfriend and I are making plans for a game best described as "sailor moon meets Persona and SaGa". How are you doing?

Greetings, everyone! Remute and myself bring you this bundle of DOS (and ) games to check out for as little as $1.86 or $2.86! Grab the "Remute XX DOS Nostalgia" bundle here: groupees.com/remutexx (games activate via Steam)
And here's a video: youtu.be/p4g-oHOaOTI

@dosnostalgic You can definitely use my name, you just have to pay a nominal licensing fee.

@brass@monsterpit.net Of course I'll fuck you. You deserve a reward.

OH MY GOD DO NOT ORDER A SEITAN BOWL. DO NOT BRING IN YOUR BABY TO TRACK FECES OVER OUR FLOOR. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.

Do straight couples make anyone else want to fucking puke

Show thread

I'm in such a bad mood I don't feel like taking care of good customers, let alone straight couples.

GO THE FUCK AWAY STRAIGHT COUPLES. THERE IS NO POINT TO YOUR EXISTENCE. GET STERILIZED.

Some mornings you come into work only to find a surprise in the oven. Guess we all forgot to take out the chicken yesterday...

A banh mi with seitan--in other words, a baguette with strips of high-gluten paste as a filling. Imagine the chew on this thing, and notice the sriracha mayo the customer requested, which suggests he's not vegan.

I think this might be a playlist that they made just for this restaurant; I am going to delete it tomorrow morning because this is just ridiculous.

Writing a hook and repeating it for 6 minutes is not music. You need to write the rest of the fucking song, and would it kill you to use a different drumbeat once in a while?

Show thread

@sculpin oh god, it doesn't smell anything like a delicious coffee granita. I can imagine it now looking great and then you zoom in with slowly mounting horror.

After listening to the same 30 song reggae playlist at work for two days straight, I can now formally conclude that it is the worst genre.

Show older
Mastodon

Server run by the main developers of the project 🐘 It is not focused on any particular niche interest - everyone is welcome as long as you follow our code of conduct!