rachel salad 🔜 GDC 🌽 @saladmonster@mastodon.social

making video games

i do not want to go to therapy today. i want to draw and space out and clear my head

having a shitty day of existential despair

i guess she desperately wanted to think i was good at something. i came out of uni with not the best portfolio or applicable skills. i just didn't know how to apply them properly.

she really fixated on this and would constantly send me shitty sales jobs. clerk at a verizon store! mall kiosk jockey! some that were 100% commission based. i am not a sales person. millennials hate sales people. i really resented her sending all of those to me.

my first job out of college was a retail grunt at a spirit halloween. there was something like 16% unemployment at the time, thought i'd still get a real job within a few months. made the mistake at one point of telling my mom i sold a drunk couple $50 worth of shitty accessories.

Gumbo is a handsome 9.5 and an elegant, dignified creature. Sushi is a disaster animal with a tiny head and too big leggs.

I am calling them kittens even though they're almost a year old and Sushi is a nearly 11 lb monster and is still growing!

me: buys the fancy, grain free high vitamin content dry food meant to help keep kitten teeth and kidneys healthy
kittens:
me: drops a broccoli nugget on the kitchen floor
kittens: A BOUNTIFUL FEAST, PRAISE MOTHER

Me: buys the fancy, no grain version of high quality meat protein ethically sourced wet food for kittens:
kittens:
me: buys the cheap basically-meat-flavored-bread wet food
kittens: yes, this is good for kittens

entering the 'we're a couple doing things with other couples' phase of post vaccination and this is... new... for me....

making a lil game prototype and i do not think 2d sprites are supposed to look like that #gamedev

i had my rebellious streak i guess but i knew how to pick fights better than her.

anyway thanks for listening to my early teen memories. it's diary time here on ol' mastadon

bitchy i know. also inconsequential. she wasn't wrong but i guess i had a little resentment from being 'the nerd friend' she could take to the movies without being under her parents thumb to meet up with boys since they thought i wouldn't let her do stuff like that.

i'd honestly forgotten about this event until today, and that her mom was a cop. i kind of lost touch with the friend in high school because she was boy crazy and i was more academically inclined. she called me immature once and i just accepted it because i didn't want to tell her i didn't need attention from men to feel good about myself lmao.

As a younger teen my best friend at the time and her mom and I took the train to DTLA from Long Beach one weekend. After we were seated, her mom, a cop, pulled her service gun out of her purse and told us not to worry, she'd protect us.