Looking up Conrad von Hötzendorf and finding... memes... lol

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Busted up my drawing hand sliiightly but other than that, we did last weeks’ hike 45 mins faster, had 100% less eyeball insects, and no weird giant blister on my spine. TRAINING

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I've been second-hand harassing bf to first-hand harass his friend to give me some of these things from his garden so I can plant them... they're called cornels

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we went into get the ring resized last weekend and saw this sizing tool, i whispered to him it was an asshole gauge when the lady walked away for a sec, haha

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I'm also growing one of these things, delightfully named the Moon and Stars watermelon. No melons yet, but the plant is healthy and the leaves are green with speckles too, it's very cute.

I REALLY want an damn melon but idk when it's going to flower and apparently these are big targets for rodents (we have squirrels and rats up the wazoo around here) so we'll see~

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impossible to look at this pic and not think YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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I love River Monsters but sometimes I question this guys dedication to the scientific process

jeremy wade: But are these fish killers? I'm going to test this theory the only way I know how...

me: please don't say by fucking around in the water with them

jeremy: ... by covering myself in fish guts and absolutely 100% fucking around in the water with them

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my river monsters fan monster, it's the ultimate killer... a bull shark and a giant stingray slammed together, humanity has no chance

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the only apology I think most people would accept is a personal one from the organizers, and a promise to recoup as much of the $ as possible to return to people affected. Obviously a ton of money will never come back but damn, do not say irresponsible things like this? "your dollars were donated to the future"? yikesss

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oh god i was just looking at horse refs and found this pic of a horse poncho and almost spit out my drink

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In other news no I have not watched too much survivor and also need to get rid of these mushrooms growing out of my watermelon plant, why do you ask

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THANKS DUDE defs was not home to myself or millions of my direct family or anything

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My feet are trapped under this dramatic croissant

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The cat is making such an ugly face rn that I have to shame him lol

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