Had a great dinner today and watched the movie, Weathering with You. It's pretty enjoyable, beautiful art and awesome Radwimps music, and there are some downright gorgeous moments. Story is a little less satisfying as Kimi no Na Wa though.

@mibo it did ^^ though I needed my partner's presence to help

Is it stress or something but I'm not doing so well mentally today...

shizuyue boosted

To all GNU project members past and present. I want to hear from you. Please email me.

Breaks, as in get up from desk after 30 mins to rest the eyes and drink some water.

I've forgotten that getting used to new spectacles can also be tiring... And I've scheduled some work time for tomorrow. I really need to learn to take breaks or I'm not going to last.

PS. It was mid-autumn festival yesterday, and I didn't know it when I picked the date, which I picked because it would be easy to remember. Full moon on a Friday the Thirteenth too? That is some luck I have. 😂

In conclusion, it was a good stream. Could definitely be better, but for my first special stream, I had fun, viewers who dropped by had fun too and regulars got to see me in cosplay and makeup, which I usually don't have the time and energy to do.

Next time I'll do better. Next time we'll have more people to play Choice Chamber with.

But at the end of the day, the few that usually pop by did pop in and we had fun! I tried some new things I haven't tried before, hadn't dared to without a push, and this was definitely a push.

Moving forward, I can see how things can be improved, have sort of re-ascertained my goals, and where to work on for my self-management.

I had some expectations, was hoping that maybe more of the regulars could drop by at around the same time, and we could play Choice Chamber together. But... while I did get people to play CC with me, it was still disappointing when compared to what I had in mind (maybe 4? or a bit more?).

I tried hard to keep up my energy for the whole of the stream. I was really hoping to see more friends drop by and surprise me... but I guess 'marketing' is important afterall.

The planning was a mess. I gave myself a lot of stress and didn't manage to confirm the schedule until a couple days before the stream.

I could have done better to spread the word ahead of time too, which I did think about but didn't end up doing. Now I keep wondering if that's why there aren't as much people as I would have liked to see.

Stream itself went well, no huge technical issues but I forgot to prepare some layout elements for the celebration, but added them mid-stream.

Makeup was applied without much trouble and didn't fall apart mid-stream at all, costume much the same. I have forgotten how itchy wearing a wig could make me though, funny thing.

A bit of processing for yesterday's special celebration stream so I can get it out of my head and focus.

shizuyue boosted

a new character!! >:D
I have so much ideas hngg -- I'd put them up as adopts but I love em too much ;;w;;

here's the DA link if you wanna see it a little more clearly! c:
#mastoart #snail #cat #oc

Tomorrow is the special stream that I've been planning and today I'm supposed to do a bunch of prep... but I haven't done any because I hyperfixated on a new shiny thing. Fu----

Oh, I'm bad at doing things that I should do. I need to turn them into either things I need to do now now today omg now, or things I want to do. Brain why.

And what's more, I've always been told that I should try exercising to help lessen my period discomfort and pain... which I don't think I fully believe?

Like part of my brain is pretty sure that in my teenage years, I was kinda physically active, but my menstrual cramps were some of the worse (might have been the soft/cold drinks' fault too).

All in all, I'm very bitter towards exercise and not very inclined to do it....

In addition, I've absorbed the idea that exercise is about persistence, about continuing to do it regularly... but every month, during the week of my period (and a bit before), I can't push myself to exercise when my body already feels awful.

Then I feel bad about stopping and just can't continue. It's a stupid vicious cycle and it keeps happening.

Ah, it clicked.

The reason why I can't seem to go and do some exercise is because I view it as a chore. It's something I should do, I have to do, I need to do for the sake of ___... but it's not something I want to do.

And my brain, being the way it is, goes 'so she doesn't really want to do it and let's not schedule it then, got it'.

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