Starting the year off just unable to get up out of bed, so this is maybe not the best sign. πŸ€¦β€β™€οΈ

Cleaning is like an exorcism for your house, send toot

The Depression, and making light of it 

Happy "I'm only showering today so I can get the sweet, sweet experience points when I check off the 'boring self-care' task on my Habitica list" season!

Time for my nightly ritual of looking at cats on Petfinder and inevitably ending up weeping!

John made a big batch of pork bulgogi and then a pot of apple-cinnamon oatmeal and the two smells together lingering in the kitchen somehow smell exactly like εŒ…ε­ and I haven't had those in so long and I miss them so much and I'm hungry and sad. 😭 I don't even know where you can get them around here. 😭

So, I'm definitely sick.

I suspect I'm sick because my nightly routine for the past several nights has been staying up till 4 or 5am looking at adoptable cats on the internet & crying, then sleeping very little & getting up fairly early in the morning in an attempt to "get my sleep schedule back on track," but it may very well have been something I ate today, or perhaps some combination of the two.

Either way, I feel so gross & puke-y & I haven't left the house all day. RIP my PoGo streaks :(

Happy ! I'm celebrating by scrolling endlessly through JetPens, whispering "I love you" to all the beautiful pens I covet but can't afford to buy (and also do not at all need)! πŸ–‹οΈ πŸ–‹οΈ πŸ–‹οΈ

Body loathing, exercise 

Oh god I just exercised for the first time in months, maybe even for the first time this year? It's awful, so awful, sweat, jelly-limbs, shakiness, achiness. I hate living in this meat-shell so much, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

I'm grumpy today, but I'm afraid to even say that I'm grumpy in case someone tries to "cheer me up" because that will almost certainly end up making me grumpier.

My aunt's gonna get me this book and I'm so excited about it! I find most poetry kind of annoying, but when it hits, oh god does it hit.
npr.org/2020/09/23/916209021/o

How can you tell when your house is sinking? I swear to god our floors are *noticeably* more uneven now than they were 3 years ago when we moved in. And there's a spot in the basement where the curve of the floor fills me with dread. And the tile grout in one corner of our bathroom has separated now, and... I never expected this house to be our forever-home, but I also don't want it to collapse while we still live in it, nor to have to pay to rebuild the foundation before we can sell it & move.

I love winter and cold weather because I like wearing lots and lots of layers of clothing, but I'm not so keen on the part where I'm wearing a tank top, long-sleeve shirt, sweater, and a big cozy scarf *inside my house* and I'm still *freezing* somehow. My husband is wearing only a short-sleeve shirt under a hoodie and is radiating heat. H o w ? 😩

Oh boy, I went down an internet rabbithole, and now I am all think-y feel-y and I would really rather not be today, I have things to get done and I don't have the time to ruminate rn. 😩

Anyway! I made a *phone call* and *talked to an actual human about an important thing* like an *adult*! Pls give me a cookie and/or a medal now, I have earned it. πŸͺ/πŸŽ–οΈ

Has anyone actually completed an AR scanning task yet? I feel like Niantic *vastly* overestimated our willingness to provide them with free labor. πŸ˜‚

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