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@swearsayer posting this on both platforms to see who gets me on school nights and who gets me on weekends

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mastodon is great because it’s like my mom (sincere leftists) and my dad (dirtbag leftists) divorced and now i’m getting twice as many presents

glad to see subtooting is already beginning to eat away at the honeymoon period of this website. i was worried happy was going to become the norm

swearsayer boosted

streaming tonight at please watch please i need to feed my family

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ass. sorry, too tedious

where are the brands??

who's gonna threaten to carpet bomb my apartment if i don't live stream myself buying and enjoying boxes of cereal

i downwinded your fart can i please get a hello

(calling yyou on the phone about website)

hey what the fuck why arent you updonking my beeps i know you're watching the syndicate wire right now

not gonna leave twitter but i'll gladly add another head to the hydra that is my hunt for validation online

they call them toots because the more i do them the further i push those around me further away

those who post fast laugh last. keep the word count low or you gotta go

hate it when a rube goldberg machine lays my broke ass out to the tune of in the hall of the mountain king

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