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Life is like a penis:
when it's soft you can't beat it, and when it's hard you get fucked.
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The Associated Press Retweeted:

Whoever dumped trash at the building made famous in Arlo Guthrie's 1967 Thanksgiving protest anthem "Alice's Restaurant Massacree" has a sense of humor. They left a grubby sofa nearby with a sign that said: "Officer Obie told me to do it." apne.ws/Kn4lH4y  #odd

Original Tweet: twitter.com/AP/status/11566142

10:15 AM - 31 Jul 2019
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Birdsite 

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You may ask: how did I become vegetable gremlin. Well it turns out I ate too many vegetables and became invisible to the eyes of christ.

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Cursed joke 

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**'Five Eyes' security alliance calls for access to encrypted material**

"The U.S.-led "Five Eyes" intelligence alliance said on Tuesday that tech firms must allow law enforcement agencies access to encrypted material, warning that failing to do so put people at risk. "

reuters.com/article/us-securit

#news #bot

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Well that is a little weird. Opened Toot! and all of my instances are gone. Time to add them back I guess.

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body horror 

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I'm going to watch a movie about a killer boar in the outback.

It's called "Boar."

Distinct from the other film about a giant boar, "Razorback."

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"And it is in his own image, let us remember, that Man creates God."
[H. Havelock Ellis, "Impressions and Comments"]
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a haiku:
Several unique brews.
He yelled at my pregnant wife.
Don't you serve sushi?

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