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Rob R

Last season's Marvel Agents of SHIELD is surprisingly good.

My Uber driver was playing an Ed Sheeran song and now I have diabetes.

The Orville is the Star Trek version of Brian Michael Bendis's mid-2000's New Avengers.

That means it's good. Better than you probably think.

Don't at me.

Or whatever the Mastodon version of "at"ing is.

Rob R boosted

"I had a dream I walked in on Tom Hanks masturbating"
"Yeah, it was upsetting"
"I mean he probably did a lot of that when he was stuck on that island in Cast Away"
"Oh my god, did he fuck that volleyball?"

Thinking about buying a can of caviar but they spell caviar with a K because it's a 7-Eleven and can someone dial 9 and 1 and keep their finger by the 1

I have been in a retail environment, exposed to its constant stream of Christmas music, for fifteen minutes and I am prepared to lay hands on someone.

The hell of being a lead engineer is, if you want to actually have time to code, you'd better block off half of Saturday.

Not the beer half, of course. Priorities, dammit.


The new Iron Chef leads me to believe that modern chefs have never read Frankenstein.

I swear I heard the parmesan ice cream say, "We belong dead."

Back at the office after a week. It's been 5 hours, and I feel like I've been beaten about the head, neck and brain stem.

From Donald Westlake to Don Winslow. I'm sensing a recurring theme here.

Gentlemen: to crime!

@theamericanjerk Jesus. Dick Durock and his porn name deserved better.

Watching Wes Craven's Swamp Thing, remembering just how hard it sometimes was to be a comics fan in the 80s.

The good news is, this is making me appreciate Alan Moore even more.

Rob R boosted

*someone sends me something*
Them: Can you sign this for me and send it back please?
*signs with pgp key, emails it back*
Them: I meant with a pen you nerd motherfucker

Picked up Donald Westlake's Somebody Owes Me Money from Hard Case Crime on a whim. God DAMN, could that guy write a crime story. Pulled me right in.

Watching Andrew Zimmern on Travel Channel and can't stop seeing a big, bald sixth grader saying, "For ten bucks, I'll eat a bug."

The federated timeline is the stroke-related aphasia simulator no one was waiting for.

Anyone who uses turkey giblets in gravy or stuffing or other edible should be tried as a war criminal.

Rob R boosted

The Mighty Thor 380 by Walt Simonson.

Holy. Shit.