Fri, 01 May 2026 21:09:08 +0000

Vampire, aged 9000 years old, says he is “not happy” with current administration

After almost ten millennia of life, this master of the undead has finally decided to take a stand. In a recent interview, we went into the home of Count Cyrus to see how ancient evil feels about today's evil. "The people should really not be letting this happen" muttered the ghoul, as he counted an assortment of fingerbones he laid out on the table in front of us.